Every Wrong Move

Moving On

2008-09-30T00:15:00.004-04:00

I have not updated in awhile, mostly because I started this blog originally to vent about my journey out of Mo-ism. It's become such a non-issue to me that I often feel like I don't have much to say here. I also have family that is so spread out that I have pondered starting a more family-friendly blog to keep in touch with them all.

And so, I invite you to visit me at my new location... http://amysperfectblog.blogspot.com

I might occasionally use this blog when the need arises. I will keep it up for now. My new blog will be pretty much the same, only my immediate family won't have access to all my old archives.

Also, please be patient with me as I get my new blog looking pretty, and also as I recreate all my links. Feel free to comment on my new blog to help me with those links.

Damn Cat - a coda

2008-08-08T22:25:00.002-04:00

After wrassling with my ding dong dang cat for two weeks trying to get her to take her antibiotic, I was thrilled that #1 she was doing great and back to her old ornery self and #2 I no longer had to suffer grave bodily injury on a daily basis.

So when I came home Monday and noticed she had one goopy half closed eye, I hoped it would quickly heal itself. By Thursday it was completely gooped shut, so I took her back to the vet. She has a corneal ulcer. Great.

So now for the next two weeks I have to put kitty ointment in her eye three times every day.

You may help the cause by donating blood at your local Red Cross.

The Week From Hell

2008-07-26T10:11:00.008-04:00

Thursday - Erik is out of town. I take Marc to his testing appointment and return to find out the hermit crab is dead. Have to call Lisey (who is camping with Erik) to tell her.

Friday - Erik calls to tell me he blew out a tire while off-roading. Approximate cost, $200.

Saturday, Sunday - No problems... Universe is saving it all for Monday...

Monday - Plumber stops by and outlines all the plumbing problems which need to be fixed. Worse than I thought, have heart attack thinking about cost. Have eye doctor appointment. Dilate eyes, which causes everything to be super bright, which leads to massive migraine. Come home to find cat (Floyd) hiding behind piano, on her side, panting and mewing. Have tickets to ballgame, which is no fun because of massive migraine and worry about dying cat at home. Leave game early and come home to find cat in same spot. Cry and stay up with cat all night hoping she doesn't die.

Tuesday - Rush cat to vet first thing in the morning - cat severely dehydrated and tests to determine what is wrong plus IV fluids will be at least $500. Have heart attack, leave cat with vet, go to work, worry all day about cat, find out cat has severe urinary tract infection and requires IV antibiotics and overnight hospital stay. Have another heart attack but feel relieved that cat is not going to die.

Wednesday, early morning - Wake up to worst storm ever. Have never heard wind so loud or rain so hard, even during past hurricanes. Freak out and grab children and bring them to bed with me. Consider going into basement, convinced a tornado is passing over. Chide self for overreacting until hear trees falling in the yard, then freak out and stay awake until storm is over to make sure windows don't blow in.

Wednesday - survey damage in yard. Two trees completely blown over which were nice enough to fall into street, so will be problem of DPW. Huge limbs down all over yard, more trees blown over in backyard. Chimney cap in neighbors yard, trash cans in street, umbrellas destroyed, pots smashed. Have to move giant tree branches to get car out of driveway. Late for work. Streets closed due to downed power lines and trees. Even later for work. Main street in town is frightening. News says yup, possible tornado.

Wednesday evening - pick up damn cat. Erik leaves for conference, leaving me all alone to try to wrassle oral antibiotic into cat's mouth. Takes an hour, only get half dose in, give up. Another storm blows in, knocking out power for 90 minutes. Happens when kids are in pitch black basement. Takes 30 minutes to calm down freaking out kids. Hang LCD work light from dining room chandelier and play Yahtzee with kids. Fun trying to give baths in the dark. No hot water. Give up. Go to bed early with kids. Let them sleep in bed with me due to freaking out factor.

Thursday morning - wake up to find out coffee maker is dead. Completely dead. There is no coffee?!!! Shake fist at heaven and scream "Whyyyyyyyyyyyyy?!"

Thus concludes the week from hell.

The cat is fine, by the way. By Thursday evening she was back to being a total pain in my butt, up in my business and climbing all over the laptop while I was typing.

Erik is back home, thank god, and he is out in the yard cleaning up the fallen branches and chainsawing the tree. And he bought me a new coffee maker. Yay!

And a Quick Work Update

2008-07-26T10:05:00.002-04:00

I alluded to a possible change in employment earlier. No news yet on that front. I will just mention this involves our gobernment and they are in no rush to fill this position, so... yeah, they haven't even reviewed the resumes yet apparently.

I am okay with this. It's a job I would love but if it doesn't work out, I am happy where I am now. I have shifted my focus lately - the debt collection work I loathe has been mostly handed over to a paralegal, which is a huge relief to me. I have also been certified as a child's attorney in our county so I have been spending a lot of time representing children - this is work I believe in and enjoy, even if it can be emotionally difficult.

So, that's the scoop for now.

Long Overdue

2008-07-26T09:51:00.002-04:00

Yes! It is finally an upate! I can't believe how long it has been so I feel like I don't even know where to start. There has been a lot that's happened so far this Summer. Some good, some bad, some just downright horrible.

School ended. We had our annual Tiki Party, which wasn't the best ever due to two factors:

#1 the huge thunderstorm that rolled in, forcing us to move the party inside the house/in the garage. The storm was over by 8:00 and cooled everything down, but I think a lot of people had already decided to stay home rather than venture out.

#2 the PTA brawl in my driveway. Two PTA moms got into a fight around 1:00-ish in the morning, and after that everyone sorta went... ooookay, time to go home. I am friends with both women so I felt extremely awkward. I haven't talked to either since that night, which makes me feel even more awkward. We still had about 75 people over the course of the evening but the vibe just wasn't quite the same as past years.

We took our annual vacation to the Outer Banks, which was uneventful in the best most vacation-y way. The kids were extremely good this year and we had the added bonus of my niece Kaylee, who was 8 months old and gave me a nice cute-baby fix. I spent a lot of time napping and doing crossword puzzles, which is seriously my ideal vacation. And I got to visit the Sonic 4 TIMES - aaaaaaaaah.

Once we returned, there were two more big events: Marc's testing and what I will refer to as TWFH - The Week From Hell. These each deserve their own entry so... Stay tuned for further updates.

I'm Meeeelting

2008-06-09T14:19:00.002-04:00

Gaaaah. It is so freakin' hot and I had court today. Which means I had to wear pantyhose. Which sucks.

So, I was duly chastized by cool Jen SIL for not updating my blog in a long time. So I am doing it RIGHT NOW.

I am feeling much much better. It's so weird - it's such a gradual thing as the meds start working that I didn't really think I was doing better. Until Erik asked, well, when's the last time you thought about killing yourself? Hey! Yeah, not this week!! That's an improvement!!

School is winding down now and I am looking forward to summer. There is a lot going on in the next few months and I am excited about fun times with my family. Work still sorta sucks but #1 I can deal with it and #2 I am exploring a career shift which might help ease that stress.

I'll keep you posted.

Case of the Blahs

2008-05-14T20:27:00.002-04:00

I've been catching up on my blog reading and grumbling about people who just don't update their blogs often enough. As I realize - D'OH! It has been over a month since I updated my own.

So here's an update.

I am all healed from my surgery. It took a good two weeks before I felt even semi-normal again and quite honestly, I am *still* trying to get caught up at work.

It didn't help that the removal of my IUD led to my first real period in about 3 years and I spent a good four days in a lot of pain and wondering how it is possible for one person to bleed so much without actually dying.

The surgery combined with its related hormone wackiness combined with overwhelming work crap combined with whatever other unknown factors unfortunately spiralled me down into a horrible bout of depression.

I have stayed on the Wellbutrin continuously and it was working fine, but I had to add the Zoloft back in. I am frustrated at the realization that I will probably need to just stay on the medicines for an extended period of time. I haven't been able to stay off of them for more than a few months without having a recurrence and I am now accepting that is just the way it is.

These past few weeks have been so difficult. I have literally had to sit down in the morning and make a list of five things at work and one thing at home that need to be done. Then I have to force myself to go through them one by one. I am so frustrated and feel like it is unfair that so much has shifted onto Erik, because I am pretty worthless at the moment.

Last weekend Erik & I left the kids with his dad and went away for a long weekend in Williamsburg. We went to Busch Gardens and spent the day riding roller coasters. The weather was crappy but that ended up being a good thing because it kept the crowds away and the temperature nice and cool. It helped lift my mood a lot to do something fun with Erik. We needed that time together.

In other stuff, Marc is in the process of being tested and we will have a meeting at the end of May to determine his grade placement for next year.

And really, I am going to try to be better about updating my blog.

Navel Gazing... literally...

2008-04-07T23:16:00.002-04:00

My belly button is glued closed. The doctor didn't use stitches, he used surgical glue. On my belly button. That is so weird.

He wasn't just being nice when he said one week off work. It is Monday night and I still feel like total shit. There is no way I'm going back tomorrow. I'd be surprised if I make it back on Wednesday.

I am SO exhausted and sore. Today I woke up, made coffee, took a shower and that was it. I was so worn out from standing up and taking a shower that I had to take a nap.

I am bored out of mind and restless, but too damn tired to DO anything so I'm just ending up cranky. I tried to take the painkillers down a dose today, but by mid-morning I was so uncomfortable that plan didn't work so well. I am frustrated at being constantly loopy from the drugs and unable to do anything. I can't drive, I can't work, I can't even do simple things around the house.

I have to keep reminding myself that my body really has been through some trauma and I need to be patient and let myself heal. But it is difficult when my office keeps calling me and asking questions and giving me messages. Come on - I am NOT calling people back from my house while doped up on massive doses of narcotics!!

I feel doofy admitting that I kinda mourn the loss of my ovary. I mean, it was one of my organs and it feels weird to know it's just not there any more.

In summary, Blaaaaah and yup, I am definitely staying home tomorrow.

I wasn't really using that ovary anyhow

2008-04-06T09:15:00.003-04:00

It's been another long gap since I've posted. What a couple of weeks I have had.

It started on Wed the 26th. I'd just returned to work from a nice relaxing long weekend, spending some great quality time with my kids and husband during their spring break. I was a little behind at work, but it was all things that I could easily catch up on.

Wednesday night I started to have some pain in my lower left side. Sharp pain. Annoying. Getting sharper. Erik asked if I needed to go the emergency room. I didn't want to go and sit all night in the e/r to have them tell me I had gas and just needed to fart. So I went to bed.

So Thursday I woke up and the pain is still there, still quite sharp and definitely still in exactly the same place. I went to work and suffered through my morning appointments until I could get in to see my doctor after lunch.

The doctor ordered an ultrasound, but they couldn't do that until 5, so I went home and tried to sleep. And drink water - you have to have a full bladder to do the ultrasound. No fun to have a full bladder when someone is pushing down on you with a metal wand thingy.

The ultrasound took about an hour - I had three different ones done and in the end it turned out I had an ovarian cyst. The doctor sent me home with some presription strength Alleve and told me it'd either rupture or shrink on its own within a few days.

By Friday night the Alleve wasn't doing a damn thing anymore, so my dear friend who just had an ovarian cyst gave me some Darvocet to get through the weekend. I called first thing on Monday to get #1 a follow up with my gyn and #2 a stronger painkiller.

I couldn't see the gyn until Tuesday afternoon. I spend Monday night crying on the bathroom floor in so much pain that I was literally shaking, sweating, crying, puking... It was awful. I somehow made it through the night and work the next morning. I even went to court. Crazy. I don't know how I did it.

Anyway, Tuesday afternoon the gyn says the decision is really up to me. We can wait and see or he can do follow up imaging or we can talk about surgery. Now, after the horrible Monday night bathroom floor incident, I'm actually feeling better. We think maybe the cyst ruptured so we decide to wait and see.

Wednesday into Thursday I feel better. Thursday night? I start to feel worse... and worse... I call the gyn first thing Friday morning and they set up an appointment for me at 12:45. By mid-morning I am in so much pain I asked Erik to drive me to the doctor, because I had to take a double dose of Lortab just to be able to walk.

The drive from the house to the doctor and then walking from the van to the office did me in. I collapsed on the waiting room couch in the doctor's office crying, shaking, sweating, etc. I was in too much pain to even be embarrassed at that point.

They get me into a room and I just lay down on the table while Erik rubs my neck. I was just breathing, trying to not scream and wail in the office. They doctor comes in and gives me some options. He can send me home with a strong painkiller, he can admit me for IV pain medicine and wait until tomorrow morning to re-image, or he can try to get me in for surgery asap.

I told him I'd been doing the wait and see for TEN DAYS and it wasn't getting better and I wanted the mother fucker out. He called down to admissions, scheduled the surgery and shortly thereafter I was being wheeled downstairs to the hospital.

During all this, Erik is making the phone calls - my parents to get the kids, gotta cancel my wax appointment, gotta find a replacement presenter for the luncheon tomorrow, gotta call the office, etc. etc.

Once in the hospital, I finally got hooked up to an IV with some decent pain relief. I slept for most of the afternoon until it was time for my surgery. I didn't really get nervous until I was in the pre-op room and the anesthesia doctor and all the nurses started prepping me. Then it all sorta hit me.

But by then the happy stuff was being administered and I was out.

So. Here's what happened - the doctor went in to remove the cyst and found multiple cysts behind the one they saw on the ultrasound. He had to remove the whole ovary and the tube. I knew that was a possibility so I wasn't too upset about that.

He also had to remove my IUD in order to do the surgery, which was okay because my husband's stupid insurance won't pay for the removal of the device. So that saved me $150 office visit.

But it did make me feel quite awful for Erik - because looking back now he really didn't have to get the vasectomy after all. They could have done a tubal ligation on the other tube while they were in doing the surgery. Um, ooooops. Sorry, Erik - you have no idea how much guilt I am having on that issue right now.

They released me the same night, which was nice - I got to sleep in my own bed and use my own shower. Yesterday I was really sore and uncomfortable, but this morning I am feeling much better. Still sore, of course, but it's just SO nice not to have the constant burning sharp pain I had before. And I have some very nice post-op narcotics that are making this much easier.

I am supposed to be off work for a week, but I just don't see that happening. Unfortunately I have the type of job that nobody else in my office can completely cover. I am planning on staying home Monday, then easing back in Tuesday, just answering messages and mail for a few hours each day, maybe working on some files at home.

It's been quite an adventure. Now that it is over I am starting to be upset about it. I mean, I am done having kids but still - it feels weird that they removed an entire ovary. Does this make me half the woman I used to be?

I mean, I know it doesn't, but these are the thoughts I have falling asleep on high doses of narctorics....

Stunned

2008-03-19T21:24:00.002-04:00

I... I... I just wasn't ready for this. I was talking with Marc about Easter and asked him if he was excited to see what the Easter Bunny brings. He looked at me for a few second like he had a secret he wasn't wanting to share. Then he whispered... Um, Mom... I know it's you.

I just blinked a few times. I asked him how long he's known. He says he figured it out before Christmas - he knows about Santa, the tooth fairy, the Easter Bunny... He knows it's me.

I asked if he was afraid to tell me he knew. He said he was because he thought if he told me he wouldn't get presents.

I told him, the secret is this - once you figure it out, you get to help. So he's coming with me tomorrow to help put together a basket for Lisey. And I told him he would still get presents too.

I asked him how he found out and if somebody told him. He said no, he just thought about it and realized it really didn't make much sense. But if it was me and daddy it made sense.

I tucked him in and went into the bathroom and cried. It's just one of those milestones I really wasn't expecting yet and it made me realize how much he's grown up.

Words of Advice

2008-03-14T01:19:00.001-04:00

I realized it has been over a month since I last updated my blog. I have no excuse, except my kids have gotten my hooked on Webkinz so I spend most of my time playing with those little critters.

However, in the past month I have learned two very important lessons that I will share.

#1 - wrap around skirt + windy day = NOT GOOD

#2 - peppermint castille soap + naughty bits = NOT GOOD

Meme time

2008-02-10T11:27:00.000-05:00

Sideon posted this and since I'm currently out of blog ideas I thought I'd play along. I added some questions because I go nuts when there are numbers missing from these!!

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Yes, my mother’s dance teacher.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Right after the parent/teacher conference last week
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? It’s okay. I usually print because my cursive looks so girly I don’t like to use it at work. That sounds dumb when I actually write it down.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Corned beef – w/ swiss on toasted rye, w/ spicy mustard
5. HAVE YOU ANY CHILDREN? Yes, two – 7 year old boy and 4 year old girl
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I’d try, but I’m really bad about keeping up contact with people
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Yes, duh.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Nope – taking out when I was 10 or 11.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Sure!
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? I love Rice Chex, but I usually eat Cracklin’ Oat Bran to keep my insides moving along.
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Not unless I have to
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? No
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? I love Coffee Heath Bar Crunch from Ben & Jerry’s but have switched to the low fat Cherry Garcia lately
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Height.
15. RED OR PINK? Pink
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I procrastinate
17. FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING(S)? I like veggies on my pizza.
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE YOU KNOW TO DO THIS MEME? Sure!! The more the merrier.
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Jammie pants – red and black plaid from Roxy. No shoes.
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Donuts and coffee
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? My daughter banging on the piano
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Cornflower blue
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? Peppermint, tangerine
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU SPOKE TO ON THE PHONE? My momma
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO MADE YOU DO THIS STUPID MEME? Sideon didn’t make me do it, and yes, I like him
26. WHICH SPORT DO YOU ENJOY WATCHING MOST? Ice Hockey before it got all wussy-fied. I liked it violent with lots of penalties
27. HAIR COLOR? Dark blonde with lots of grey currently disguised by highlights
28. EYE COLOR? Blue/Green depending on what I’m wearing and the weather
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACT LENSES? Nope
30. FAVORITE FOOD? Mac & Cheese
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? I hate scary movies – happy endings for me!
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Hoot (with the kids). In the theater, the Veggie Tales movie
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Black w/ OMG pwnies on it
34. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer.
35. HUGS OR KISSES? Hugs
36. FAVORITE DESSERT? I am a fool for brownies
37. BOOK SITTING ON YOUR SHELF YOU KEEP MEANING TO READ BUT HAVEN’T YET? Breathing Lessons by Anne Tyler
38. FLOWERS – ROMANTIC OR WASTE OF MONEY SINCE THEY DIE ANYWAY? I think they are romantic.
39. WHAT BOOK(S) ARE YOU READING NOW? Atonement by Ian McEwan (for bookclub this month)
40. WHAT’S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Yoda
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Hoot (see above)
42. FAVORITE SOUND? Cat purring
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Japan
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Nothing extraordinary. I can sight read music really well and that always impressed people. I also have a great memory.
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Havre de Grace Maryland

Hop, Skip, Jump

2008-02-05T20:48:00.000-05:00

We got called in for a parent/teacher conference. This strikes fear into the heart of any parent. My first reaction was WHAT DID HE DO?

Nothing bad, whew. His teacher has noticed over the course of the year that Marc is really excelling at math and reading. He decided to test him. He gave Marc the end of third grade assessment. Marc passed.

So now what? Marc has been referred for SST evaluation (Student Services Team). Over the next several weeks we will need to decide what to do with him, including the possibility of moving him from 1st grade directly to 3rd next year.

I want to cry. I don't know what to do. This is very overwhelming to me. I feel like either decision is the right one and the wrong one.

But seriously - what do you do with a seven year old who does this:

Question - create your own problem for ___ + 1 = ___
Marc's answer - ∞ + 1 = ∞

Right now...

2008-01-18T22:24:00.001-05:00

My son and my husband are downstairs playing Halo 3.

My daughter is taking pictures of the cat with her new digital camera.

I am drinking a glass of something new I bought today - V8 Fusion (acai mixed berry) and not only do I love it but BOTH my kids asked for a second glass. One glass counts as one serving of fruit and one serving of vegetables. They think it's Hawaiian punch. Smart V8 people.

This is not a sexy exciting Friday night blog post but right now I am feeling quite content. The combo of Zoloft and Wellbutrin is working well for me. The whole mood of my house is so much better than a few months ago.

I made the comment to Erik the other day that we haven't fought in, like, weeks. He said, yeah, it's been really nice. Then there was a long pause. And I said, yeah, but then I have to acknowledge we were only fighting because I was sorta crazy. He was nice enough to just hug me and not say anything.

Lisey has now moved on from taking pictures of the cat to playing vet. Right now she's trying to fix him up by wrapping him in an ace bandage. I should really go save that poor animal...

A week of Happys

2008-01-11T18:42:00.000-05:00

Wednesday was my Happy Anniversary - 9 years!! We celebrated by getting steamed shrimp and a chocolate dipped fruit bouquet - both indulgences but oooooh so yummalicious. I also bought each of the kids a small present. I feel like they are part of our anniversary because they are part of our marriage.

Tomorrow is Marc's Happy Birthday. Right now I have 9 seven year olds in my basement. It is very noisy. They are all spending the night. I am hoping to survive the evening.....

I heart New York - Day 4

2007-12-31T11:50:00.000-05:00

Our last day in NYC dawned rainy and cold. We really wanted to see Bryant Park so we didn't let the weather ruin our plans. We just bundled up anyway and after another breakfast at the Tick Tock (this time turkey sausage - yuuummmm) we headed on our way.

Bryant Park wasn't crowded at all because of the rain, so we perused all the little shops and I found some cute bearhand mittens for Marc (camoflauge) and Lisey (cheetah, of course). We met another of Sara's friends for coffee - this time I was delighted by the pair of British children at the table next to me. They sounded just like Charlie & Lola. The little boy fell out of his stroller and said, "Mummy, I fell ov-ah."

It was getting to be time to go home, so we enjoyed a slice of greasy cheesy New York pizza in all it's drippy goodness then headed to the train station. The train was completely sold out so boarding was pretty much a total clusterfuck. Sara and I were lucky to get two seats on the same car, catty corner from each other.

Erik picked us up at the station. The rain kept away my homeless drunk lady so she was not there to greet me.

I had a wonderful trip and it was really nice to spend time with my sister. I love New York City - I love its energy and the buzz of life there. Everytime I leave, I'm always looking forward to my next visit!!

I heart New York - Day 3

2007-12-31T11:26:00.000-05:00

The next morning it was time for shopping in Soho!! We got breakfast at the Tick Tock (their homefries are the best) and bundled up. It was pretty chilly the whole time I was there, but with scarves and gloves we were quite comfortable.

And with that I will make a note about fashion in New York. It isn't really fashionable in winter. It is mostly people in layers. Because it's freezing outside then cold in the subway then hot as hell in side every building so you are constantly dressing, undressing, re-dressing, bundling.

Anyway, we went inside a lot of stores in Soho but nothing caught my eye. We ended up at Anthropologie, my favorite store and I found a dress I liked, but when I tried it on... Meh. It just wasn't cute on me.

The girl in the dressing room thought I'd like another dress on the floor, which they only had in a size 4. The blue dress I had tried on was a 6 and she said it looked big to her. So I went ahead and tried the green dress she brought me. It was one of those, on the hanger, blah but when I put it on? POW!!! It looked amazing. It was snug but it fit. I was in love!

We stopped for lunch and then did a little more shopping. Sara found some cute pashminas and I had fun watching all the people who live above the stores who had their blinds open but weren't really dressed yet.

After lunch we decided that a nap would be nice. I am always down with the nap, believe me! For dinner that night Sara took me to 44 & X in Hell's Kitchen. First of all, apparently you have to be a beautiful man to work there. I swear I have never seen so many men in one place that were all... beautiful. It was almost eerie.

Sara & I sat at the bar so I was right next to where all the servers came to put in their drink orders. This gave me an excellent view of the eye candy, as each one had to stand right next to me several times over the course of the evening. It also gave me an earful of their private conversations, and yes, I am pretty sure that every single one of those waiters was gay.

Sara assured me that they had the best mac & cheese she'd ever had and she was right. It was that good. I love me some mac & cheese but this was beyond amazing. We also split the crab fritter which had huge chunks of crabmeat in it. Being for Maryland I am picky about my crab dishes but this was excellent.

Over-stuffed from dinner, it was time for the show. Sara and I always loved the movie Xanadu. I still know all the words to all the songs. When I found it it was coming to Broadway, I knew we HAD to go. And it was great!

The show was campy and cheesy and overdone. But it was all done very tongue-in-cheek so it was just hilarious from start to finish. I loved it. What's not to love? Glowsticks, men in hot pants on roller skates, leg warmers - it was heaven. Dare I say... Xanadu?

After the show we went to another bar to meet up with some more of Sara's friends. I tried a caramel apple martini this time. It was so good but so sweet. I couldn't have more than one but the one I had gave me a decent buzz that lasted for a few hours.

We took a cab back to the hotel and standing at the corner waiting to cross the street, Sara said, "Um, is that guy peeing over there?" And I looked and yup - not only was he peeing right there on the sidewalk, but his whole junk was just hanging out. Hello, twigs and berries. We both just started giggling so he waved and slurred, "Happy Holidays, ladies!!"

And that was my NYC moment of the trip.

I heart New York - Day 1 and 2

2007-12-31T11:03:00.001-05:00

My trip to NYC started out with me, standing on the platform at the Amtrak station and a drunk homeless woman standing on the other side of the tracks yelling "You just get on that train cracker!! That's right, cracker bitch, get on your train!!"

This was NOT in New York, by the way. I was still in my hometown. The actual train ride was not nearly as exciting. I arrived at Penn Station and checked into my hotel and decided I was really hungry. The New Yorker hotel has a great diner downstairs called the Tick Tock Diner - it is open 24 hours a day and I've never had anything there that wasn't good.

DAMN I was in the mood for a BLT so that's what I had for dinner. After that, believe it or not I was really tired so I went to bed early that night.

The next morning I got up early and went to the Natural History Museum. I walked by all the windows at Macy's on my way to the subway. They really are incredible. I was one of those gawking tourists standing on the sidewalk with my mouth gaping open.

The museum was amazing and HUGE. I didn't see even close to everything in the museum before I was starving and needed lunch. The museum was not very crowded either. There were several school groups, but they could be easily avoided and I found myself in many of the exhibits completely alone. It was just me and the security guard in the hall of gems, which was one of favorite exhibits. I love sparkly, what can I say?

After lunch it was time for shopping. I made my way back to Times Square and ventured into the giant Toys R Us. I have to say, it was crowded but not nearly as bad as I expected. I got a cheetah for Lisey and some legos for Marc. The line was long but moved so fast I felt the need to tell my cashier how impressed I was. Seriously, I've waited longer than that at my local Toys R Us with one person in front of me.

People watching is one of my favorite activities and Times Square is the best place in the world to do it. I settled myself into a window seat at Starbucks with a coffee and a slice of banana chocolate chip bread for the next hour or so, just watching the people pass by.

I had a few hours before my sister's train arrived, so I decided to take a nap. Aaaaaaaaaah, it felt nice. Once my sister joined me, our first order of business was FOOD.

New York is fun to visit with my sister Sara because she lived there and worked on Broadway and she knows all the good places to go that are not just for tourists. We decided on Mexican and she took me to Tacocita.

Lord almighty, that was some good eating. I had tamales, one chicken and one pork and BOTH fabulous. And the guacamole? I don't really like guacamole but I was scraping the bowl with the last remaining shards of chips to get it all.

After dinner we went to meet one of Sara's friends for drinks. She works on Curtains, so we grabbed a table at the Atrium in the Marriott Marquee and waited. I spent about an hour just watching the elevators go up and down. Okay that sounds kinda stupid, but seriously - these elevators are really cool. I felt like I was in a space port.

My other favorite activity of that evening was watching the mom and dad next to us downing several bottles of wine while their essentially unattended two boys (I am guessing 6 and 8 years old?) went apeshit all over the bar. I found it extremely entertaining but the bartenders didn't seem to enjoy it quite as much.

I learned very quickly that it is wise to order a frou frou drink in a frou frou bar. The Irish coffee I got first was awful. Really awful. So I got one of their signature drinks - a pear martini and Ooooooooh, that was tasty.

It was getting to be past midnight by then and I am old so I was ready for bed. We walked back to the hotel and I totally crashed. I forgot how much walking there was to do in New York!!

Sorry for the delay!!

2007-12-30T20:40:00.000-05:00

We had a computer crash that necessitated my personal nerd herder (that would be my husband) wiping the hard drive and reinstalling everything. It's taken quite some time but so far the computer is running fine. Anyway, I am back now and ready to update!! Stay tuned!

Start spreading the news...

2007-12-20T10:39:00.000-05:00

I'm leaving today!! In five hours I will be on a train headed to Penn Station. I worked very hard to get this trip and am so excited that I'm having a hard time sitting still at my desk long enough to finish up all the last minute little things I need to do.

Thank you to everyone who has left kind thoughts and emails over the past few weeks. I have been on the new meds now for two weeks and they are starting to work. I am feeling much better. I am still a little blue, but have to remind myself that I feel BETTER, and there is a little more improvement every day, so that is what's I focus on.

Just for example, it's amazing to look at my time sheet - the first week of December I barely billed 3 hours every day. This week I have billed doubled that every day. I have caught up on files that have literally been just sitting on my desk for two months.

I'll update when I return from NYC, hopefully with some fun pictures and stories!

Snow Day

2007-12-05T21:42:00.000-05:00

Erik went with me to the doctor this morning. I love my physician. She is in her thirties and we have kids about the same age. She is just incredibly understanding and always says the right thing. She listened to all my concerns and frustrations. We are going to try a combination of Zoloft and Wellbutrin to see if that works for me.

I started to cry as I left the doctor's office - a mixture of relief and frustration and anger. It's hard to describe. I know I need to do this and I know the Zoloft is already helping, but it's still upsetting. My doctor reminded me that you can't wish depression away. Thinking positive thoughts doesn't work, just like it doesn't work in treating arthritis or asthma or diabetes or any other chronic illness.

When I left the doctor it was snowing. By the time I got my presciptions filled it was starting to cover the roads and schools were calling for an early dismissal. I wasn't feeling up to going back to work so I used the weather as an excuse to go home. Erik and I had a nice lunch of soup from Panera and then spent the afternoon putting up the Christmas decorations.

I picked up the kids early but I was so exhausted and emotionally drained I ended up taking a nap while they watched TV. We had a Christmas party to go tonight and Erik made me go. I really really really didn't want to, but I did end up having a great time. I was glad Erik forced me to get up and out of the house.

The roads driving home were awful - the snow is really coming down and it is cold enough that it's sticking. Erik and Marc are both praying for a snow day tomorrow but I have to go to work no matter what. I am horribly behind after spending the past month essentially staring out the window unable to properly deal with pressing matters.

My plan for tomorrow is to take care of all the easy stuff (quick letters, wills, etc.) in order to move the greatest number of files off my desk as possible. Off to bed now.

Feeling Better

2007-11-30T00:06:00.001-05:00

Thanks to everyone for supportive comments this week. It really helped me get through some rough moments.

I am feeling better today. Erik is out of town until Saturday night but I took both kids by myself to his dad's house for dinner and cake (for Erik's bro's birthday). I really had to make myself go, but I'm glad I went. I got to hold my new niece for awhile and she's SO beautiful.

Then I swear to GOD this video the birthday boy showed us made me laugh so hard I was on the floor crying:

Another Sleepless Night

2007-11-28T02:15:00.000-05:00

Today was not a good day. I am feeling drained and after reading the kids their new Christmas books, I just sorta stayed on the floor of the living room curled up staring at the fireplace. Marc is such a sweetie - he asked what was wrong and I told him I was just feeling a little bit sick. He got his pillow and blanket and came out and curled up next to me on the floor.

I just went ahead and got ready for bed and was asleep by ten. Marc had a nightmare around midnight and woke me up moaning and fussing. I brought him in to snuggle up with me but he had a hard time settling back down and by the time he was finally back asleep, I was wide awake. And now I can't get back to sleep.

I am still feeling stressed at work. I have been involved for several years in a highly contested case and it became highly contested again this week. I allowed myself today to not return any phone calls about it but tomorrow I know I have to jump back in and it will be most unpleasant.

Tomorrow I am meeting with one of the partners to discuss a new direction for me at the office. I am hoping if it works out I will be able to start phasing out the litigation portion of my practice. It's a simple matter of economics - if I can bring in money handling this new venture I can justify turning away other types of cases.

I am taking it day by day right now. My main focus is keeping myself together for my kids, and it is just requiring way way more energy than it should. I am getting through work by making very detailed lists and then just checking things off one at a time, forcing myself to keep going.

Really, the person getting the brunt of it is Erik and I don't know what to do about that other than just beg for his patience. He offered to come with me to my doctor's appointment next week and that meant a lot to me. Between trying to keep it together in front of the kids and trying to squeak by at work, I just don't have anything left for him right now. And that makes me unspeakably sad.

It's back

2007-11-27T00:33:00.000-05:00

It's like a mist that sorta slowly filters in. At first the world just looks not-quite-so-clear but then gradually it obscures everything. Then it's just dark.

I realized today that I spent an entire really fun holiday weekend with my family doing things I love... and I didn't smile. Not once. Erik kept asking what was wrong and all I could do was shrug.

Because nothing is wrong. Except I constantly am on the verge of tears. I feel trapped in my life. I spent all day thinking of ways to escape my job, my marriage, my family. There's a constant loop running in my head telling me everyone I know would be better off without me.

I should have seen it coming. The insomnia. The increasing unwillingness to endure social situations - a missed luncheon here, a last minute cancelled coffee with a friend there. The growing pile of laundy I just couldn't bring myself to put away.

Erik finally had enough of it tonight and told me it's time to stop pretending it's just going to pass. I'm starting back on the Zoloft. I have enough from my last refill to start phasing back on it. I'll call tomorrow for a new prescription.

Fuuuuuuuuuuck.

Impending Holidays

2007-11-20T21:43:00.000-05:00

As an update to my last post, I was officially fired today - by the client's wife. This was after I left 3 phone messages and sent a letter to her husband (which he never responded to). I finally sent an email to his wife in desparation to find out what the heck was going on with him.

It became clear to me as we spoke that the problem is not me at all. For example, she bitched at me today that her husband has not received any messages or letters from me in response to her message. Well, that's very interesting... Because I've been trying like crazy to get a hold of him.

Suddenly I realized the problem is that my client DOES NOT TALK TO HIS WIFE and rather than accept that her husband is not telling her important details she chooses to assume I am not doing my job. I am still annoyed but not enough to lose sleep any longer.

So, we are leaving tomorrow to spend Thanksgiving in Virginia Beach with my family. I learned today that there is wi-fi so I will be taking my laptop and can hopefully update my blog from there.

Happy Thanksgiving all!!

Insomnia

2007-11-14T23:59:00.001-05:00

I'm having a hard time sleeping tonight so I thought maybe getting up to blog will help me barf some of this stuff out and I will feel better.

I went shopping over the weekend to buy new skirts for work. My old skirts were literally falling off so to avoid a major wardrobe malfunction I had to get something that fit. Today I wore a size 4 to work. And all day I kept looking in the mirror convinced that it MUST be too small, but it wasn't. It actually really fits.

I have learned as a rule that people won't really notice weight loss until you start wearing a new size. And today I noticed a great disparity in reactions of men vs. women to what I was wearing. Men made nice comments (such as "wow, you look great") and women made catty comments (such as "soon you'll probably just disappear" and "my god, are you starving yourself or something?").

These reactions really bother me. I am angry that after working so hard all these months to get in shape that I still feel self-conscious because other women are still judging me. I am angry that I even care.

I also found out today that I am probably getting fired by a client. You'd think this wouldn't bother me because really it happens all the time. I always tell people that it is important to have a good fit between lawyer and client. Sometimes personalities and styles just don't mesh. I don't usually get offended when someone decides to get another lawyer - sometimes I am the one who suggests it.

I don't know why exactly this one is bothering me, but it's on mind tonight. I think it's because I didn't see this one coming. I know the client didn't agree with my assessment of the case, but I respected his decision on how to proceed and felt we were making progress in that direction. To receive a very terse message, not even from him but from his wife, that he was picking up his file tomorrow afternoon just felt bad. It felt lousy and I'm upset by it.

Last night I learned that Lisey is a tactile learner. Marc is kinesthetic and so is Erik. I am visual. I left this meeting with the realization that 90% of my frustrations with my children and my husband are a direct result of the fact that I never stopped to consider they don't perceive and process the world like I do.

I think my migraines might be getting worse. Lately when I get them I not only have the headache but I also get horrible vertigo. I have fallen over a few times because the room seems to turn and I can't keep my balance. And then my brain seems to short circuit for several days even after the pain is gone. I have a hard time coming up with names or words and feel distracted and scattered.

I am really looking forward to Friday. It is an early dismissal day for elementary schools, which means I have an excuse to leave work at lunchtime and spend the afternoon with Marc. He will watch TV or play video games while I get a glorious nap. Then we will get pizza for dinner. Erik has poker night so I will put the kids to bed early and then get the TV all to myself to catch up on The Hills and America's Next Top Model.

It really is way past bedtime. This was therapeutic but oh my, I will be tired tomorrow morning.

Quirks

2007-11-14T20:57:00.000-05:00

Erik tagged me to list 7 random things about me. I've already done this before a few times so I told him he had to help me think of new quirky things to share. This is what we came up with:

1. I like a lot of ice in my drink. When Erik gets me a drink, I tell him to put how many ice cubes he thinks I'd want then add three.

2. I have the directional awareness of a homing pigeon. You take me someplace, I can find my way back. If I've been there once, I can get there again.

3. I hate pickles. All of them. In any form. Dill, sweet, kosher, whatever. Gross gross gross.

4. I have a different wreath for my front door for every month of the year.

5. I love guinea pigs. Before I had children, I kept pet guinea pigs. I had all sorts of pig accessories too - a pigloo and a cavy cozy. And once I even made Erik come with me to a pignic where all my guinea pig friends got together with their guinea pigs for a big party. When my guinea pigs died, I made Erik bury them in our local state park.

6. My closet is completely organized by color. It's like a rainbow in there.

7. Erik finds it quirky that I have twenty different bottles of shampoo and soap in the shower, but I think this is totally normal girl behavior. They are all different smells - somedays I want fruity, maybe musky, maybe floral, maybe spicy. Doesn't everyone have different shampoos and soaps for different moods?!?

American Education Week

2007-11-12T18:57:00.001-05:00

I went to a continuing education conference today. It ended early afternoon, which left me with some free time. Since it's American Education Week, I figured I'd stop by Marc's school to spend some time watching him.

I got there just in time for SSR (for those who don't remember, that's Silent Sustained Reading) and Marc & I were able to sit on the carpet in the corner and read to each other. After that, it was Math. They had to figure out how to make 42 cents out of 6 coins and I am ashamed to say about half the 1st graders had that solved before me. (And there are two correct answers!)

I didn't realize how far Marc has pulled ahead in math. While the rest of his class worked on some basic addition, Marc was learning how to add 3 three-digit numbers. Like, 203 + 357 + 859. That sort of thing.

This was something new for him, so I sat with him and showed him how to carry. We did the first few together, but then he wanted to try by himself. He did a pretty good job, though sometimes forgot to actually add the number he carried. I supposed since he's only 6, it's a skill he has plenty of time to acquire. I even tried to trick him by giving him a problem that would require him to carry a 2 instead of a 1, but that wasn't tricky to him at all.

Seriously, he's kind of starting to scare me a little bit...

Wedding Pictures!

2007-11-10T09:54:00.000-05:00

Last night was my best friend's wedding. Everything went well - the only crisis was that the bride's shoes got lost. We ended up having to substitute another pair (brown) with the assurance to her that nobody would notice her shoes. Nobody did. She looked beautiful and the wedding was lovely. I splurged and had my hair done professionally. Here's some pics!!

Here's Lisey and I getting ready.

Here's a picture of the dress!!

Lisey was quite a hit at the reception, as she grabbed the mike, hopped up on a chair and sang DonCha by the Pussycat Dolls. Lisey was the life of the party. She lasted through the whole reception (past 11:00).

Marc was less excited. He was jealous he wasn't part of the wedding party so he played his PSP most the night. When the battery died, he was done and my parents took him home.

I will have to post pics of Erik when I get some. We didn't have any on our camera. He was quite handsome in his tux.

A Double Milestone!

2007-11-06T11:44:00.001-05:00

Last night Marc lost another tooth. He's now missing both bottom front teeth.

The tooth fairy brought him a gold dollar, a silver dollar plus a bonus half dollar for losing two in one day.

And his bottom molars just broke through.

I can't keep up with how fast he's growing!!

Another Milestone

2007-11-05T13:14:00.001-05:00

Marc lost his first tooth today. It came out at school this morning. I got a picture message on my phone - big smile with a gap in the front. I remember the day he cut that tooth - we were visiting my sister in Atlanta, standing in line at a Krispy Kreme when I first noticed it.

Forgive me, I'm getting a little choked up and I need a moment here...

Parent-Teacher Conference Day

2007-11-01T20:16:00.000-04:00

It's that time of year again!! Marc's teacher believes it is important to involve the kids, so it was actually a parent/teacher/child conference. Marc got to show off some of his favorite work, and we talked about what he likes and what he doesn't. He's reading at a 3rd grade level and his teacher has noticed he has a definite flair for math.

I also brought a mocha from Starbucks with me to the conference. One of the other teachers asked, "Is that a bribe?" And I said, "Damn right it's a bribe." It totally worked too - Marc's teacher gave me a big hug and told Marc, "Do you know that I love your mother?" The funny thing is that of ALL the kids, Marc is the last one who'd need a bribe for the teacher.

In other fun news for the day, my Victoria's Secret shipment arrived and with it my festive undies for the upcoming holiday season. Lisey brought the package in and opened it for me. She was so excited about this holiday underwear she felt the need to tell the entire restaurant tonight at dinner... "Guess what mom got today in the mail? SPARKLY CANDY CANE BRA AND UNDERWEAR!!"

Halloween Pics

2007-10-31T22:01:00.000-04:00

Here's my cutie pies!! Marc was a fire ninja and Lisey was a cave girl jungle princess. This picture just captures their personalities so much... I crack up every time I look at it.

She's here!! She's here!!

2007-10-30T20:40:00.001-04:00

My niece has arrived!! Cool Jen SIL had her baby yesterday evening. A beautiful baby girl whom I got to visit twice today. I am in love with her already - she is absolutely gorgeous. You did a great job Jen (and Andy, too, gets some credit for his small contribution).

I'd like to also raise a cheer to brave Jen who fulfilled her wish to have a completely unmedicated childbirth. It is not an easy thing to do and many people, including hospital people, tend to be very unsupportive and even downright mocking of the idea. I am so so so proud of her strength and her commitment to having the birth she wanted.

*wild thunderous applause for Jen*

Wry Interviews Me

2007-10-28T22:23:00.001-04:00

I asked Wry Catcher to interview me - here's her questions!

1. What is the trait or personality aspect you’re most happy to have gotten from your mom/dad/family of origin? What one thing do you really wish you could get rid of?

I am most happy to have gotten my family's smarts. My parents were very big on education, not just school-wise, but cultural literacy too. History, music, art, literature, math, science... It was important to my parents that we grow up to be well rounded. I really do come from a family of nerds. We used to sit around and do logic problems for fun on vacation.

The one thing that come along with it, and that I have passed on to Marc (unfortunately) was a drive to succeed at everything. I would be devastated to get a B on any test, no matter how unimportant. I had to be the first one done an exam. I had to have the highest score on a paper. I wanted to be first chair in the band. I had to have the lead in the play. As I grew older, I found it difficult to try new things - if anything was a struggle and I wasn't the best at it, I'd just give up. I am making a very conscious effort to mediate that tendency in my son. I can see now that it is, at its root, hard-wired.

2. When you first started dating ExV, what kinds of reactions did you get? How did you feel about it then? What do you think about it all now?

When ExV and I started dating, he was 17 and still in high school. I was 21 and working in the office at the high school (different department, my office was just located in that building). The reactions were completely and totally disapproving. My friends thought he was too young and too much a slacker. I even had someone use the words, "not good enough for you at all". Plus he wasn't LDS, so church people didn't like him either.

His family and some of his friends thought I was too old, that he'd miss his whole youth because I was tying him down too young. Plus I was LDS, so I was trying to suck him into my cult.

I think even we, at the beginning, thought of it as a fling - something to bide time until I left for law school and he left for college. Then we ended up changing our schools so we could stay closer to each other. His mother tried to break us up many times. She was NOT happy when we got married "so young" - he was 21 and still had a year left of college.

Sometimes I think, wow, we WERE young. Especially Erik. I'd probably flip a little bit if my kids wanted to get married while still in college. But I'm glad we were naive enough not to know any better. I knew that Erik was nice. I knew that he was funny, and romantic, and loved kids and loved cats. That's why I wanted in my life. I knew he'd eventually get older but he'd always be a great guy. I didn't want to let him get away.

3. What are the top three reasons you’re glad your daughter and son won’t be raised mormon?

a. They will not be taught outdated one size fits all gender roles.

b. They will be raised with a healthy view of human sexuality and without irrational guilt over normal desires and urges.

c. They will learn to think for themselves and stand on their own feet without relying on geriatric man platitudes.

4. How does pole dancing (as a hobby not a job, LOL) make you feel? What has it changed about how you see yourself? Same for your tattoo? Will you get more? Is there anything else you still want to try?

I love pole dancing - I find it very liberating and very fun. It was also very hard, so it's been one of the first things I've stuck with even though it's not easy (see answer #1!) It's definitely changed the way I view myself - learning to move my body a different way and seeing all shapes and sizes of women being sensual and strong.

This is my 3rd tattoo, and my only regret is that I didn't do it during Summer so I could show it off more! I think at some point I will get another one, but I'm not quite sure what yet. I've really come to appreciate that most people get tattoos as a way to memorialize something important to them.

I'm not sure what else I want to try. Maybe skydiving at some point. I think I'd really dig the freefall.

5. Who are your favorite people you’ve met from online interactions? Why? What are the aspects of online interactions you like the least? When thinking of people you really only know online, what will make you “like” vs. “dislike” someone?

Wow, that's a toughie. I adore Jer. He was one of the first people I met on the Foyer. We started our journey out of the church at the same time, and we've stayed good friends ever since. I think I probably talk to him more on IM than anybody else. We have the exact same taste in music and sense of humor.

I was also really excited to meet Wry and JMK in DC. They were just as funny and gracious in real life as on-line. I'm hoping for another meet up soon - I get quite jealous of the large DAMU crowds in SLC that can get together so often.

There are very few people from on-line that I "dislike". I don't really like attention whores (an occasional incident is okay but not a constant LOOK AT MY POSTS) and blatant trolls. I also don't like the mean girl phenomenon that tends to occur on all-female boards.

6. What one thing about your current life do you most love? And really dislike? If you had a magic wand that could grant you one wish that wasn’t to do with money, what would you ask for?

Right now I'm very happy with my immediately family. The kids are at a great age where they are so much fun and I'm just so in love with them both. ExV and I are also in a good place and are excited about the future. We just did a lot of work on the house and it looks great.

I dislike family drama. Right now it's in a lull, but it's always sort of simmering underneath. As much as I love the holidays, it always brings up issues. Scheduling conflicts and gift competition and such - sometimes it's my family, sometimes it's ExV's family.... I know there's no completely normal family but sometimes ours feel SO dysfunctional that it makes me sad.

I think if I could change one thing, I would tweak my job. On the whole, I like what I do. But I wish I could focus solely on doing wills and estates and get rid of the other stuff. I'd really love to be able to remove litigation completely from my job - I'm finding it very draining dealing with conflict on a regular basis.

NYC... Here I come...

2007-10-27T13:48:00.000-04:00

I did it!! This morning I officially hit my 15 lb weight loss mark. I was so excited I jumped up and down screaming right in the middle of the gym.

So here's the final statistics - lost 15 pounds, 1 inch from my thigh, 2 inches from my hips, 1.5 inches from my waist, one inch from my bust (but didn't lose anything from my cup size, yeeeaah!!) and 1/2 inch from my arm. I went from a size 10 or 12 (depends on brand) to a size 6 or 8.

Just to put it in perspective, I am now the weight on my driver's license...

which was issued when I turned 21.

Couple's Meme

2007-10-26T21:03:00.000-04:00

1. Who eats more? Probably Erik. But not much more. We are still trying to be very good.

2. Who said "I love you" first? I can't remember. I think it was me, but it was nearly simultaneous.

3. Who is the morning person? Neither of us.

4. Who sings better? According to my kids, neither of us can sing at all.

5. Who’s older? I am, by almost 4 years.

6. Who’s smarter? I am more book smart, but Erik can figure out how to fix shit like a genius.

7. Whose temper is worse? Mine. Definitely mine. Erik's never broken a glass by throwing it in the sink but I have... many times.

8. Who does the laundry? Mostly me, but Erik helps if I ask him over and over again.

9. Who does the dishes? We switch - one week dishes, one week litter boxes.

10. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? He does, until displaced by a child in the middle of the night.

11. Whose feet are bigger? His - he has ginormous feet.

12. Whose hair is longer? Mine.

13. Who’s better with the computer? He is. It's why I keep him around.

14. Do you have pets? Yes, three cats.

15. Who pays the bills? I do. I'm not sure Erik even knows what bills we have.

16. Who cooks dinner? Usually me, but depending on our schedules, Erik will help out.

17. Who drives when you are together? Erik, unless he's drunk. Then it's me.

18. Who pays when you go out to dinner? Our spending money comes out of Erik's account, so he does.

19. Who’s the most stubborn? Me.

20. Who is the first one to admit when they’re wrong? I'm never wrong, so this question is moot.

21. Whose family do you see more? It's probably about equal. Our parents both live very close and we try to spend time with each as often as possible.

22. Who named your pet(s)? Erik named Floyd and Anakin. The kids named Charlie.

23. Who kissed who first? I kissed him first, but he'd been nibbling on my ear so it's not like it was unprovoked.

24. Who asked who out? I can't remember. We went to the movies but it wasn't really a date until #23 happened.

25. Who named your children? Erik did, but I had veto power.

26. Who’s more sensitive? I cry more, but Erik has a soft side.

27. Who’s taller? Erik is by about an inch. When I wear heels, I am.

28. Who has more friends? Erik. I'm much more introverted so it is hard for me to make friends. I steal Erik's friends after he makes them.

29. Who has more siblings? I do. I have 3, and Erik has 2.

30. Who wears the pants in the relationship? Depends on the issue. Probaby me, just because Erik is more laid back about things so he just lets me do my thing.

Sigh.

2007-10-25T19:33:00.000-04:00

I've been practicing law for nine years. I'd hoped to make it ten years but I missed...

Today, I got my first official letter from the Attorney Grievance Commission.

Fuck you very much, ungrateful former client. I'm so glad that I kept you out of jail so you could turn around and try to get me disbarred. Unfortunately for you, there is a transcript that shows you and your recollection of events is full of shit.

Hmmmm...

2007-10-23T00:27:00.000-04:00

Am I a bad mom if I'm secretly hoping Marc is NOT feeling better tomorrow morning so I can take the day off work??

Circles and Triangles

2007-10-21T13:45:00.000-04:00

Last night I went to my friend Josh's 30th birthday party. I am pretty open about things on my blog, but I've never talked about Josh and I am not sure I really ever will. There are still things in my past that I hold very deep inside, that are still painful to think about.

I also don't like to be coy on my blog, hinting at some amazing story then proclaiming, "Oh! I can't talk about it." So I will just summarize. Josh and I dated. Josh and Erik were friends. Josh and I broke up in a spectacularly painful way. Erik and I started dating. Erik and Josh were then no longer friends any more.

Then there is Mike. Mike dated my sister for many years. We were all friends. Mike was the best man at our wedding. He and my sister broke up (also in a spectacularly painful way) right before my wedding. Awkwardness abounded and eventually Mike and Erik were no longer friends any more either. At some point in all this drama, Mike and Josh were also no longer friends any more.

I had not talked to Josh in many many years when Erik & I saw him again at their high school reunion about two years ago. Josh had married his high school sweetheart and they were expecting their first child. I talked for a long time with his wife and we have emailed occasionally since then. About the same time, Erik reconnected with Mike through MySpace. They started hanging out again.

So Josh's 30th birthday party was yesterday night. His wife invited us, and also asked us if we knew how to contact Mike. It had been so many years, she said - it's time to make peace and find the old friends we've lost over stupid things that just don't seem so big any more.

It was so much fun. We met Mike and his girlfriend a little bit early and the four of us spent some time having a few drinks and catching up before meeting the rest of the party. There was no drama, no awkwardness. It was just so nice to see people that we knew and loved, but just got disconnected from along the way.

We ended up at the Hustler Club, because it just isn't a party without a trip to the strip club!! I had to take a moment and soak it in. There were Josh, Erik and Mike, watching their wives/girlfriends pass dollar bills to the strippers with their teeth. We were laughing and buying each other drinks and talking about how we all became adults somewhere along the way. We have mortgages and kids and careers. It's just crazy how much time has gone by.

Driving home, I was so glad that we went. Josh's wife was absolutely right - it really was time to let the past go. Damn, we had forgotten how much FUN we always had together. We can't wait to do it again soon.

Unintentional Picnic

2007-10-18T20:44:00.001-04:00

Erik is out of town at a conference, so I had to leave work early to pick up Marc from school. I took him to pick up the best pizza in the world (as he calls My 3 Sons) and then we picked up Lisey from daycare.

We pulled into the garage and with my hands very full of pizza and backpacks, Marc informs me the door is locked. The door from the garage into the kitchen. The door that is never ever locked and to which I have NO KEY. Because why do I need a key? I have the garage door opener!!

I panicked. I freaked out. I almost cried. Then I thought - it's okay.... because I have pizza so we WILL NOT STARVE. I called Erik to ask where the spare key was. I had one made in the event of this exact situation. The spare key is hanging on the key rack - right inside the door that is locked. This doesn't help me and I am now mad at my husband for putting our spare key inside the fucking house. That is a quote, in case you were wondering.

I called my dad. He does have a spare key but he is eating dinner right that second with my mom and her cousin that is visiting from out of town. He can be here in about twenty minutes. That is okay with me.

So we ate our pizza sitting in the driveway. It was a pleasant afternoon and it really wasn't so bad. We were just finishing up as my parents arrived to rescue us. I immediately took the spare key and hid it outside in case this happens again.

Oh, and eventually Lisey fessed up to locking the door this morning - she was trying to keep out burglars.

Better Day

2007-10-17T17:54:00.000-04:00

The doctor said I'd feel better within 24 hours and damn right, I feel better!! My nose is running which is a GOOD thing - my headache is greatly improved and I am starting to get my energy back.

Also, my son can now ride a two wheeler. Seriously, this is absolute proof that he is his father's child. Last time I rode a bike I shattered my radial head. This kid learned to ride a two wheeler in an afternoon. Clearly that is not my DNA working there.

Oh, and I was too busy being miserable yesterday to appreciate the great thing that happened at the doctor. My weight, fully clothed and in shoes, was just two pounds from my ultimate goal. Whooopa!!

Headache from Hell

2007-10-16T07:48:00.000-04:00

I have had a headaches for over 3 days. It is awful. It started Saturday. I spent all afternoon in bed and had to miss our annual trip to the pumpkin patch and corn maze in Lancaster because I couldn't get my head off the pillow. I cried about missing it and sent text messages every ten minutes telling my kids I loved them and I was sorry.

It continued into Sunday. I couldn't do anything except curl up in a ball and close my eyes and try to sleep. I managed to get a few things done around the house but could only stay vertical for about 15 mins at a time before having to go back into the dark bedroom. I hate telling my kids to play quietly or mommy's head will explode. I hate it so much.

I actually felt better on Monday morning, but Monday afternoon it was back. I almost had Erik come get me at work because I wasn't sure I could drive home as the sun was setting. I dry heaved half the way home. I spent most of last night in tears. I went to bed at the same time as the kids because trying to stay awake was pretty much pointless.

Through all of this, I have been taking both of my migraine medications and they seem to be only half working. They'd work on the nausea and the light sensitivity. But they really didn't seem to be helping with the pain and last night I swore they seemed to be making it worse.

This morning I woke up feeling much better overall - but the headache is still there. Only it has settled into my face and I am coughing up huge wads of snot. Hey, guess what? Apparently as I was battling the migraine, I was also getting a sinus infection. Leave it to me to get two completely different headaches at once.

Autumn, I do love you but goddamn I hate your tag-a-long step-sister Ragweed.

Edited to add: I just got back from the doctor. She said, oooooh, that's baaaaad. Nasty sinus/ear infection. 10 days of horsepill antibiotics plus 6 days of steroids. Wheeeeeeeee.

Quest for NYC - The Home Stretch

2007-10-08T22:34:00.001-04:00

The end is in sight. It is now Week 11 of the 14. I hit a bit of a plateau the past few weeks. I didn't lose any weight at all for 2 straight weeks. I was stuck. I was very discouraged by the numbers but gave myself the mental pep talk - weight can vary, focus on the inches lost, look at all the clothes that are now too big and go put on your new size 8 jeans that actually fit now...

Then last week between very busy plans and being sick I didn't make it to the gym. Today I wasn't feeling that great either but I hated to get out of the habit. So I made myself go. I did an easy work out - I dropped all my weights down by 5 lbs and only did 20 minutes on the treadmill. That was enough - I actually stopped a few minutes early because I started to feel a little dizzy and knew my body was telling me it was time to rest.

The good news is...!!! I must have worked through whatever plateau I hit because I was back down and on schedule. Only 3 pounds to go!! The most gratifying thing was this though - moving down the big block on the scale - the big 50 lb block that separates weighing 151 and 149.

I haven't been able to move down the big block since, um, I think it was back in law school. I don't think a ka-thunk ever sounded more lovely. Moving that little piece down down down down.... Oooooh, gotta move that big block down - ka-thunk!! Yessssss!

Lazy Sunday

2007-10-07T16:23:00.000-04:00

Today is a lazy day. I've been fighting a cold for the past week or so. Friday it caught up with me. I couldn't take the day off and sleep because I had way too much to do.

Friday I had to take Marc to get his flu shot. While we were there, I had the pediatrician take a look at a weird rash in between Marc's toes. Turns out he has athlete's foot!! He didn't even squeak when he got his shot - such a brave kid, even watched the nurse give him the shot.

I dropped him back off at school and then had to go to court. At this point I was running a fever and felt like crap. I ended up settling both of my back to back cases, so I went back to the office and suffered through the next few hours. I didn't feel like cooking, so I picked up a pizza on the way home. Marc said it was the best pizza EVER. Yay, me.

After that, it was time for haircuts. I still felt awful but I went ahead and got my fall highlights done. When my hair grows out, it's shocking to me how much GREY is in my hair. I started going grey at 18, and I've consistently been covering it since then. Highlights seem to work the best - I only have to get them done every 4 months and it just makes the grey strands look intentional.

So Saturday I woke up feeling like death. Fever was higher and I just ached all over. Erik went to the gym and I stayed home and watched my DVR'd episodes of America's Top Model. Then I went to sleep. I slept all afternoon until it was time to go to dinner. We had plans to take my parents and Erik's dad to Kobe for dinner and I really really really didn't feel like going anywhere.

I went ahead and dragged my sorry ass out of bed. Dinner was okay. I wasn't very hungry. Lisey didn't like the big fire on the grill at the start of the dinner, and Marc didn't like the sauce on his chicken so he just wouldn't eat anything. I was too sick to be patient with them so had to work very hard at controlling my extreme annoyance with their behavior. I think our parents had a nice time though - it was our treat and they seemed surprised and grateful for that.

I had a hard time sleeping last night. Even though I was still so tired, I would fall asleep, then wake up sweating, throw off the covers, fall asleep, wake up shivering, bundle up, wake up sweating, repeat, repeat all night long.

This morning, Erik started on remodeling the kid's bathroom (heaven help us all, we're back down to one toilet and shower) and also had to tackle the yard - yes, leaves are starting to fall and since we live in the forest it's an every weekend thing to stay on top of them.

I finally figured out how to keep the kids occupied - Christmas shopping! I know it's only October and it violates every holiday rule I have personally imposed on myself, but I had a huge stack of catalogs - letting the kids go through them with sticky notes and pens kept them occupied for like two hours, during which I napped on the couch.

I also tried to get some stuff off the to do list: Dishwasher emptied, laundry done and folded, invitations to bridal shower for friend addressed, started Christmas lists (ugh, I'm so ashamed, I feel dirty writing that).

Gaaaaah - this post was pretty boring. I plead illness. I am trying to convince myself that I feel better now but it could just be that I'm really high on two different cold medicines that are interacting in strange and glorious ways. I think I understand why housewives get addicted to speed. I feel like shit, but yet all the laundry is done and I'm ready to cook dinner...

Adult teeth

2007-10-04T00:28:00.000-04:00

Marc continues to amaze me. He told me his math homework was soooo boring, so we started doing very simple algebra to keep him interested. The other day I wrote this problem for him: x + 2 = 3, what is x? He immediately knew x=1. Good, but that was boring.

So I decided to really challenge him. I wrote this problem: x + 1 = y, y + 5 = 8, what are x and y? I let him sit for a few minutes and when I came back he had written "x + y = 4". It took ME a few minutes to realize that he was right and that when I asked him what "x and y" was, that meant x + y to him.

This week was his semiannual trip to the dentist. Early last month Marc had a 7-10 day run of a low grade fever. He was cranky, didn't feel right, didn't eat well, but I couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. He eventually started feeling better and the fever went away.

Well I learned at the dentist this was, in fact, because my six year old WAS TEETHING. Um, yeah, okay, nobody told me this happens to first graders.

So Marc now has his first permanent teeth - his upper molars erupted last month. His front bottom two teeth are loose as well. He was so thrilled to have adult teeth.

I took him to dinner at Boston Market that night and even though he has steadfastly maintained for many years that he HATES turkey, he decided to try some of mine. And he loved it - and ended up eating half of mine. He informed me that now he has ADULT teeth, so he can eat adult foods and they taste good.

Tonight my very picky eater had fish for dinner. Not even fish sticks - this was fresh bass that he caught the other day while fishing with Erik. And he ate green beans. He told me he wants to try broccoli next because that is an adult food and he'd probably like it now that he has adult teeth.

Here it is!!

2007-10-03T11:07:00.000-04:00

I didn't post much last week. I was in a bit of a rut. Wasn't feeling well, overwhelmed at work, blah blah blah. But Monday night I finally got my tattoo!!! So of course I had to post. I apologize for the picture quality - our digital camera bit the dust so we had to use Erik's cellphone instead.

I love it! I am thrilled with how it turned out. It's still healing so the colors will improve over the next few weeks.

Happy Autumn!!

2007-09-23T18:21:00.000-04:00

Autumn is my favorite season. I love the weather and the food and the colors. Much like JM, I view the first day of autumn like the first day of the year.

Today was a beautiful day. The weather was warm and sunny. We walked over to my parents house for some cream of crab soup, a perfect first day of fall meal.

We opened up all the windows and screen doors so the lovely breeze could blow through the house. We spent most of the afternoon cleaning out Lisey's dressers. She has grown so much over the past year that none of her clothes from last Fall really fit any longer. We filled a box and a half of her too-small clothes. I realized she desperately needs plain colored long sleeve shirts, so next payday I'll put that on the list of must-haves.

It was such a nice day that I brought the kids out of the basement and sent them into the backyard to play. They ended up playing "sniper" until dinner, hiding behind trees then jumping out and pretending to shoot each other. Not what I would have chosen for the game but extremely entertaining to watch nonetheless.

I was still in an autumn mood so I made a potpie for dinner. I wanted something warm and comforting and savory and that just sounded good. With grapes, the perfect first day of autumn fruit.

I brought all of my Halloween t-shirts out of the back closet to wear over the coming weeks. When the weather cools down a little more, I'll put away tank tops and sandals and bring out the sweaters and boots.

I believe that I am suddenly having a craving for an apple crisp with caramel drizzled on the top. Normally I am very much against cooked fruit, but I will make an exception and bake one this week to celebrate the season.

Living with Asthma

2007-09-22T20:25:00.000-04:00

I took Marc this week for a routine follow up with his asthma doctor at Hopkins.

*Unrelated editorial note - when I did a search for the phone number of the clinic I searched under "Johns Hopkins Asthma Bayview". Yahoo asked if I mean John's Hopkins. Oh hell no. Because it is not John Hopkins or John's Hopkins. It is Johns Hopkins.*

I feel very luck to live so close to Hopkins. When Marc was first diagnosed with asthma, he was just barely 3 years old. I was thrilled to learn that there was a pediatric asthma/allergist specialist so close to us. I am always in the waiting room with at least one family who has FLOWN IN to see this doctor.

His progress has been amazing. We took him off the Singulair at the last visit and he's been doing great. At this point, he does Nasonex daily for the allergies and then also Pulmicort to help control the asthma. He only uses his Albuterol inhaler when needed - it's been just a handfull of times since our last visit.

The doctor says he's doing great - hopefully he will be one of the lucky kids who outgrows asthma, though he'll always have the dust mite allergy. He commended me on controlling the environment - we have no carpet in his part of the house and non-allergen casings on the pillows and mattresses, even in our bed because he sneaks in there so often. No stuffed animals in the bed and everything washed in HOT water, double rinsed at least every other week.

I mentioned the trouble we often have when we travel, because we stay in hotels that are not as clean as our house, of course. He suggested doubling up on the dosages of both medications 3 days before we leave and while we travel.

Our next visit is in June. If he makes it through this winter with no major respiratory infections or pneumonia, we will try to take him off the pulmicort at that point. I asked about him getting Flu Mist and he advised against that - apparently the Flu Mist vaccine uses a live virus and it can cause problems in anybody with reactive airway problems. He said he should absolutely have a flu shot though, since the flu can cause real problems in kids with asthma.

Our appointment was over pretty early, so we had time to go to the Inner Harbor. It was a beautiful day and we walked over to the Hard Rock Cafe for lunch, then back to the Science Center where we spent the afternoon at the Animal Grossology exhibit and the Space exhibit.

It was fun to spend some one on one time with Marc. He's grown into a really interesting person and I just love to hear him talk about school, friends, interests, etc. It was such a shift when we saw the doctor - Marc did most of the talking, answering the questions about his symptoms and his medications. The doctor told Marc that if all his GROWN patients were as well-informed and responsible about their asthma he would be thrilled.

Word Cloud

2007-09-21T21:04:00.001-04:00

Hopping on the bandwagon - I've seen these one several blogs so had to have one of my own...

What's the Secret?

2007-09-18T10:13:00.000-04:00

It has gotten to the point now where most people are able to notice that I've lost some weight. Often the question that follows is "What's Your Secret?" They seem very disappointed when I tell them, There is no secret. I had to eat less and exercise more. It has been hard work.

But for those of you who really want to know (some of you have asked) here is what I've been doing:

1. Eat less - This was a real pain in the butt for the first few weeks. At the risk of sounding super weird, yes, I actually measured everything. That meant using the measuring cup, or counting out the pretzels, etc. At this point, I don't have to do it any longer, because I've gotten used to what the portion sizes look like. But it was quite a lesson for me.

I also kept a food diary for the first month of everything I ate. Again, this was a total pain in the butt, but it was also extremely useful. Having to look up the calorie content of everything I ate made me think twice before putting it in my mouth.

I also try, if I know we're going out to eat, to look at the menu first and the nutritional info if they have it. That way I can have a pretty good idea before we go what I want to order.

I have also started planning out my meals, as much as possible, for the week. It not only helps with the grocery shopping, but I can adjust a little bit. If I know we're having a big dinner, I'll have soup for lunch. If I know I'm going to a luncheon one day, I'll plan something lighter for dinner.

And the main thing is this: there is absolutely nothing that is "off-limits" to me. I like food. I like good food. If I tried to eat nothing but salad and fruit I would go crazy. I have one night off per week that I can eat whatever I want without guilt (so I can have my royal red robin burger and love it). I also allow myself an occasional sweet treet. But that's the key - it's occasional.

2. Exercise more - Erik & I had to sit down and put it on the calender. It's hard to find time to go to the gym, but we've worked it in. Right now, I try to go three times a week. Twice a week I'll do 30 minutes of weights then 30 minutes of treadmill. The third time I'll do 45 minutes on the treadmill. If it works into the schedule, I'll trade that third trip to the gym for a pole dancing class instead.

When I do weights, I do a pretty standard weight circuit and aim for 2 sets of 12-15 repetitions. When I can do 2 set of 15 without any struggle, I move the weights up.

We also signed up for the mommy & me yoga class with the kids once a week. It's not a heavy duty work out but I do try to practice the stretches with the kids every few days. I am not very flexible so I need to work on that more than anything.

SO, that's my "secret". It's really no secret at all. The first month was very difficult and there were nights when I wanted to eat an entire pizza instead of going to the gym. I also felt like the weight was not coming off and that was frustrating. Especially when Erik was losing SO much faster.

But now we are well into the 2nd month and I've built some momentum. I haven't change my routine very much but I'm losing weight more consistently. My goal was 5 lbs a month, and I've been able to keep with that.

I guess it takes some time for the body to adjust and I'm glad I stuck with it. I know I've lost inches, judging from the problem I'm having with my pants falling down all the time.

For all of you who are joining me in the quest to be healthier - yay!! I love the company.

It was a good day

2007-09-15T23:07:00.000-04:00

This is one of those what-I-did-today posts. Because it was a good day.

First of all, Erik played paintball this morning, but my kids were angels and just quietly played in the basement watching TV and eating pop tarts. I didn't wake up until 10:00 a.m. - they let me sleep that late.

We headed down to Arundel Mills, with a stop at the bridal shop because my bridesmaid dress came in. I tried it on to show Erik and um... yeah... It was WAY too big. Too big to just fix with alterations. I momentarily panicked because the dress was special ordered - until the very nice lady assured me it was no problem. There was plenty of time to order the next size down.

The dress was SO big she actually had me try on one that was TWO sizes down, but then it was way too small in the bust area - yay! I'm not losing my boobs. She suggested going one size down then having it taken in just the few places that were a little loose.

Next stop was Arundel Mills, and the kids were very excited about Medieval Times. We met up with Marc's teacher and his wife and two kids. It was really fun to spend time with another family and I was very happy the evening went so well. The kids were angels, Marc ate all his chicken (he's so picky, this is a MAJOR big deal) and I'm not sure I've seen the kids having so much fun in a long time.

After dinner and the show, we went to Bass Pro to let Erik shop for lures (barf - they are so gross) and watch the fish in the big tank. I also wanted to go to the Quiksilver outlet because (despite my advancing age) Roxy is one of my favorite brands. The shirts were so awesome I got two for me, then two for Lisey and another two for Marc!

As we were leaving the mall Erik mentioned that he was noticing my jeans were starting to get loose... I had been hitching 'em up all night long. These used to be my "skinny jeans". It's bizarre.

On the way home, I put in Cats for the kids to watch. Because I love musicals, and I love cats, so naturally, I love the musical Cats. I realized Lisey had never seen it - and I guessed right. She was totally enthralled.

When we got home, the kids tried to figure out which of our cats matched the characters. I got out Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats and we read a few of the poems to narrow it down. We decided that Floyd is totally Grisabella (not one of T.S. Eliot's cats but oh well) and Anakin is the Wild Rumpuscat. Charlie is a definite Jellicle Cat - and Lisey now knows where he goes when he stays out all night... Dancing at the Jellicle Ball!

Quest for NYC - Half Way there...

2007-09-13T20:54:00.000-04:00

Well, my goal was to lose 15 lbs. Today was the official half way mark. And I've lost...

7.5 lbs!! I'm officially right on target, and I'm thrilled.

And I celebrated by eating an entire custard filled Krispy Kreme donut and it was gooooooood.

Things I am Loving Right Now

2007-09-08T11:12:00.000-04:00

It's time for another edition of ten things that I just think are cool and make my life a little bit happier.

1. Edible Arrangements. Chocolate Dipped Fruit Basket - Behold the glory. Erik had a bad week and in lieu of flowers I picked up this baby for him. We've been enjoying it's chocolate covered goodness non-stop. It's chocolate covered heaven, that's what it is.

2. Medieval Times. Kid's Month! - I've wanted to take the kids for a long time to Medieval Times but it's just SO expensive. I decided to see if they had any specials running and lo! Hark! It's kid's month - And kid's are FREE with purchase of an adult ticket. Folks, that's a savings of $37 per kid. We are totally going next weekend.

3. Starbucks. Pumpkin Spice Latte - yes it's back. It's like the leaves changing color or the geese flying south. As I'm still on my quest for NYC, I've found if I get this with skim milk, no whipped cream, and only two pumps of the syrup, it's not a total diet buster and still tastes yummy.

4. Think Geek. Give your kid herpes! - Marc's favorite toy collection now has additional microbes available, including herpes. And fat cell. These are a great Christmas gift for the person who has everything - except heartworm.

5. ExVestigator. ExV's blog - Just pimping my hubby's blog. He doesn't know how to do it himself.

6. Mommy & Me Yoga. Sorry no link for this one, but it's a non-credit class that is being offered at our local community college. (I take exception to the name, as my husband and I and both our kids registered, but that's okay. We'll tear down gender stereotype walls one brick at a time.) My kids LOVE it. They want to practice their poses every night before bed.

7. Free massages. Several years ago I did some legal work for a good friend of mine. It was a somewhat complex matter and he was newly married with a new baby at the time. Instead of having him pay me, we bartered - he's a massage therapist by trade. Later on, he moved and we lost touch for a few years, but recently we got in contact again. He was reviewing his old clients and realized I still had 11 credits left!! Did I mention he makes house calls? Erik and I both got worked on Thursday night. Aaaaaaaaah.

8. Shiny Toy Guns. Hello little boys, little toys - I've talked about this band before, but I get to see them again at the end of the month in Philly so I've been listening to them more often lately. This is Lisey's favorite band. She knows all the words to Le Disko.

9. Twilight. Twilight Series - Okay, so I kept hearing the ladies on this bulletin board talk about these books all the time, so I checked it out. I had to get over my immediate prejudice against it, as the author is a graduate from BYU. But I have to admit, these books are pretty good. Fluffy, yes. But I like brain candy.

10. The world's greatest cheeseburger. Red Robin - Tonight, we feast. My personal favorite is the Royal Red Robin Burger. Because meat, cheese, bacon and mayo just isn't enough - they put a fried egg on the top. I can feel my arteries clogging already...

Yay! Another Meme!!

2007-09-03T20:02:00.000-04:00

I've seen this on a few different blogs lately so I'm joining in with my anwers.

1. What time did you get up this morning? 9:20 a.m. - I got to sleep in because I had a dentist appt and therefore the morning OFF work.

2. How do you like your steak? Rare. The bloodier the better.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? The Bourne Ultimatum. Yummy Matt Damon.

4. What is your favorite TV show? Robot Chicken.

5. What did you have for breakfast? Mini-donuts and coffee.

6. What is your middle name? Lynne.

7. What is your favorite cuisine? American comfort food - like, macaroni & cheese or cheeseburgers.

8. What are your favorite chips? Pringles.

9. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Muse, Black Holes and Revelations

10. What kind of car do you drive? Toyota Sienna - hot mom minivan.

11. What is your favorite sandwich? Hot corned beef on rye w/ swiss cheese and spicy brown mustard

12. What characteristics do you despise? Refusal to take responsibility, lack of simply courtesy

13. What are your favorite clothes? jeans, sweater, boots

14. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation where would you go? New Zealand

15. Favorite brand of clothing? Anthropolgie for casual, Talbot's for work

16. Where would you want to retire? Outer Banks, NC

17. Favorite time of day? Nap time

18. Where were you born? Havre de Grace, MD

19. What is your favorite sport to watch? Ice Hockey back when they had more fights

20. Who do you think will not do this meme? People who don't read blogs

21. Who do you expect to do this first? Hopefully hubby

22. Pepsi or Coke? Pepsi One or Diet Coke w/ Splenda - no nutrasweet for me

23. Beavers or Ducks? Ducks - I'm from the decoy capital of the world, you know

24. Morning or Nite Owl? Totally a night owl

25. Pedicure or Manicure? Pedicure. It lasts longer.

26. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share? I'm getting a tattoo next week

27. What did you want to be when you were little? Married to John Taylor of Duran Duran

28. What is your best childhood memory? The day I got my first cat

29. Ever been to Africa ? No, but my parents have and I'm so jealous of them

30. Been in a car accident? Yes, just a little fender bender many years ago

31. Favorite day of the week? Sunday

32. Favorite restaurant? Don Pablo's

33. Favorite flower? Daisies

34. Favorite ice cream? Ben & Jerry's Coffee Heath Bar Crunch

35. Favorite fast food restaurant? Taco Bell

36. How many times did you fail your driver's test? Once and only passed by one point the 2nd time - I can NOT parallel park

37. From whom did you get your last email? My friend Kristen

38. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Victoria's Secret

39. Bedtime? I try by 10:30 but usually it's closer to midnight

40. Who are you most curious about their responses to this? The whole of Outer Blogness

41. Last person you went out to dinner with? Husband and kids

42. What are you listening to right now? My husband taking off his shorts and yawning

43. What is your favorite color? Blue

44. How many tattoos do you have? Two, but getting another one next week

45. How many are you sending this meme to? Open to anyone who reads it!!

46. Favorite magazine(s)? People, Playboy

47. What time did you finish this meme? 10:15 p.m.

48. How old were you when you got married? 25

49. How old do you want your kids to be when they get married? Not really an age, but at least done school with a job.

Accidental Inversion

2007-08-30T20:53:00.000-04:00

My schedule has been a bit goofy this week, so I ended up having to do pole dancing class tonight. I thought I was doing Level 1, but I didn't read the schedule close enough because... apparently Thursday night is actually Level 2. Level 2 is almost all inverted spins. You know, climbing the pole and flipping upside down and sliding down the pole with no hands. That sort of thing.

Oh Lordy.

When I realized I was in the wrong class, I almost left right then. But the teacher was so nice and she basically took a few minutes to teach me some Level 1/Level 2 transitional moves that I could work on. And I DID THEM. Yes - I actually did one inverted hanging position then an inverted slide!!

Now, you may say, but Amy - it was only, like, 6 inches off the floor. And you would be correct. BUT still - for that few seconds I was upside down sliding down the pole with no hands. And that is a start.

Quest for NYC - One month down...

2007-08-28T22:08:00.000-04:00

It has now been one month since Erik & I originally started our little competition. He is a total shit and has lost 10 lbs. I hate him. Okay, not really but I still think it's just abysmally unfair. But that's okay. Because I am proud to announce I am right on target - I have lost exactly 5 lbs in one month. Yay me!!

But as I originally blogged, this wasn't just about weight - it was about doing better and being healthy. And the thing that absolutely thrills me most is the progress I've seen over the past several weeks. I have moved most of my weights up by at least 50%. I have been able to increase my speed and incline on the treadmill. My pantry is almost empty of snacky treats but my fridge is full of fruits and veggies and yogurt.

I've had to start fastening my bras one hook tighter. My size 10 jeans that I originally just wanted to fit in are now loose. I am sleeping better. My lovely IBS symptoms have subsided. I went to NYC with my mom for a weekend and was able to splurge on a piece of real NY cheesecake without feeling any guilt.

Two months to go, so now it's just keeping the momentum. Plus I have a new reason to stay the course... My best friend is getting married on November 9th and we went to try on dresses over the weekend. The bridesmaid's dress she picked is beautiful - and is nicely form fitting and has spaghetti straps plus an open back. Ladies and gentlemen of the blogging world... I WILL be smoking hot in my dress and I WILL post pics. This I swear...

The Pick-up Artist

2007-08-22T15:37:00.000-04:00

I don't know if anyone else out there is watching this show on VH1, but I can't decide if I love it or hate it. I keep really wanting to hate it, but yet... I don't - I find it fascinating. Really fascinating.

Anyway, last night part of the training for the guys to prepare to become a master pick-up artist was to tell a story to a group of elementary school aged girls. The point was that if you can keep a group of young girls interested, you can keep a group of single women at a bar interested. It's all about being able to hold their attention.

I'm going to leave the whole is this sexist and infantilizing women angle out of this blog in favor of this comment: Who needs a master pick up artist when I got myself a man with an actual master's degree in reading books to little kids?

I was laughing so hard at the whole segment that I made my husband watch it again with me. Apparently I am married to the studliest creature in the entire world - a male elementary school librarian!! Who knew??

Franken-Marc

2007-08-22T15:21:00.000-04:00

This weekend Erik's dad watched the kiddos while we went on our hot date. Right as we were getting ready to leave, Marc was wrestling with his step-uncle and somehow managed to bite his tongue. Marc started crying and screaming and blood was pouring out of his mouth.

I had him to spit in the sink, at which point he became hysterical - BLOOD!! BLOOOOOOD!!! It took almost 10 minutes to get that damn thing to stop bleeding enough to even see how bad it was. And it was pretty bad. The bleeding eventually stopped but he had a good 1/2 inch gash in his tongue.

Anyway, after the initial freak out because his tongue was bleeding to death, Marc now has a pretty wicked looking nasty cut. And he is SO proud. He's been walking around the past few days just sticking out his tongue at everyone. Look! Look! I almost bit my tongue in half!! Blaaaaaaaaah.

Why Target is really stupid

2007-08-21T16:41:00.001-04:00

I love Target, I really do. So it pains me to relate this story, but my GOD this is so dumb.

School starts here next Monday. This is the week for back to school shopping. Every child in grades K-5 in this county needs at least one marble composition book. My son, for instance, requires four.

And Target is sold out. W... T... F...? It's still a week before school starts and they are already sold out? Listen to why...

Because they had a lot in stock all summer and they didn't sell, so they stopped ordering them. And they aren't getting any more in until at least September.

I'm not sure who is in charge of ordering the school supplies at this store, but they must never have actually gone to school. Because they would certainly realize that 99.9 fucking percent of marble composition books will be sold THE WEEK BEFORE SCHOOL. And if you are already sold out and there are still seven days before school starts, wouldn't you order MORE?

I think we need to bring back Weenis of the Week, and ordering person at Target gets my nomination...

A sink!! A sink!!

2007-08-19T10:08:00.000-04:00

I have a toilet, toilet paper, shower, sink (w/ running water even) and even shelves and drawers. Plus my husband took me on a real date last night - dinner and a movie. Yay!!!!

This just ain't right

2007-08-18T07:48:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time I used to have dreams about sex. All the time. I am one of those lucky people who has lucid dreams fairly often. And it is great, because I quickly learned that anytime I realize I am dreaming, I can have sex with ANYBODY I WANT because it's only a dream and it isn't cheating.

So last night do you know what I dreamed about? Exercising. Yes, I had a dream I was in aerobics class. I mean, wtf?? The night before that I had a dream that I was eating a brownie. This healthy shit really sucks. Dreams about food and exercising... It's a goddamn waste of a dream.

I miss my threesomes with Angelina Jolie and Justin Timberlake.

Quest for NYC - Update #2

2007-08-16T09:19:00.000-04:00

The scale is sloooowly moving down. I emphasize the ooooo in sloooooowly. I think the world should be like Celebrity Fit Club where I step on the scale and a cute doctor tells me I've lost SEVEN POUNDS since my last weigh in. But in the real world, it's more like ONE POUND. Actually it was none, but then I realized I had been drinking coffee all day and hadn't had time to pee, so after I went to the bathroom, I had lost an entire pound. That is kind of sad, really.

And in other news, I have a toilet now. Still no shower and still no sink and still no husband, but at least I have a toilet. Unfortunately, I can't find the toilet paper. Sigh.

I miss my bathroom

2007-08-12T16:57:00.000-04:00

There is temporary insanity at my house. Hubby is in the process of re-doing our bathroom. It still had the original sink, cabinet, mirror, lights, etc from when my parents built the house 30+ years ago. Also, it had carpet, and we've wanted for a long time to take that out and put down tile. I also wanted new paint on the wall.

Silly me, I had no idea what sort of undertaking this was going to be. I came home from work Wednesday to find that the bathroom was totally gutted. The toilet was sitting inside the tub. It is still there. Don't get me wrong - Erik is making tremendous progress and is working SO hard. But it's taking some time.

And I miss my bathroom. I miss my toilet. I also miss my bed, since the bathroom is right off the bedroom and I couldn't sleep there #1 because of the paint fumes, then #2 now because Erik is working in there until 3:00 a.m. every night and it's too damn loud.

I can't find anything - all my toiletries are in boxes stacked up in the bedroom. I can't find my razor blades, my floss, my feminine hygiene products - it's so frustrating. I have to walk across the house whenever I have to pee. I have to use the kids shower. None of this stuff is really that bad... It's just... annoying and frustrating.

Not only that but since Erik has been spending insane amounts of time working on the bathroom, everything else in the house? Not so much. Including the kids and the laundry and the dishes, etc.

I miss my bathroom, people. I miss my comfy toilet seat and my hairbrush (which I still haven't found in the boxes) and my shampoo (which is trapped behind the toilet sitting in the shower) and my bed and mostly my husband. Sigh.

Quest for NYC - Update #1

2007-08-08T22:02:00.000-04:00

First of all, I'm having a difficult time deciding what exactly my starting weight should be for this little quest. I'll just share too much information so you'll understand my dilemma - the first time we went to the gym, I was just getting over a severe bout of IBS (yes, my doctor actually told me once after a colonoscopy that I had the most irritable bowel he'd ever seen) so I think that weight doesn't count because I'd been shooting liquid fire out of my ass for 48 hours.

Then, as is so often the case with so many of us poor folks who suffer from IBS, following the colon on fast forward comes the colon on pause. So then the next time I weighed in, I hadn't passed anything out of my ass for about 3 days. I told Erik I'd gained 3 lbs and he said, You are so full of shit, and I said, yes exactly!!

So, that's that. Today I was at the exact same weight as the first weigh in, but I'm not discouraged by that. I know I'm making progress - I've increased all my strength training weights by at least 5 lbs and I was able to raise the incline and speed on the treadmill tonight as well. I am happy with that.

I've also been very good about keeping a food diary. This is the only thing that works for me. Being forced to think about how many calories are in that slice of chocolate cake makes me think again about eating it.

In other news, ALL MEN SUCK - Erik has lost like 5 lbs just by thinking about working out and cutting out, like, one slice of cheese a day. It's just so unfair.

BTW, you can read my hubby's blog here.

Watching them grow

2007-08-05T14:59:00.000-04:00

Today as we were leaving the gym, both of my kids ran from the childcare room over to the water fountains. Marc took a drink from the tall one, and Lisey took a drink from the shorter one.

This may not seem like any big deal. But I had to stop for a minute and catch my breath. Because I had this flash of carrying Lisey in my arms because she couldn't even walk yet, while balancing Marc on my knee to boost him up so he could reach the water fountain, and him being drenched all the way down the front of his shirt because he hadn't quite mastered the skill of pushing the button while drinking.

I had to take a deep breath and literally fight back tears. I know it was just such a small thing. But I suddenly had this overwhelming sense of time passing too quickly and I felt dizzy, like the 3 1/2 years between when Marc first used that water fountain and that moment had just gone whizzing past my head. They grow so gradually I don't notice it until instances like this, and then it just surprises the hell out of me how big they are.

I came home to find that a set of birds has again used my lavender wreath on the front door to build a nest. There are three baby birdies in there, peeping away while the mother bird is sitting on the nearby dogwood tree having a fit that my cat Charlie is out sleeping on the porch. And life goes on.

Antonia's Line

2007-08-02T20:27:00.001-04:00

I've been utilizing Netflix lately to catch up on all those foreign films I've always wanted to see but could never convince my husband to rent with me. Since I have MY VERY OWN QUEUE, I can fill it with subtitled movies without bitching and moaning from him.

Last night I watched Antonia's Line, a Dutch film that won the 1996 Oscar for best Foreign Language film. And it was wonderful. I loved it. I laughed, I cried... It moved me.

In a nutshell, it's a movie about a woman who moves with her daughter back to her hometown following WWII. Her mother has passed away so she returns home to take over the family's farm. It is really a celebration of life and love and the passing of years and seasons and the cycle of birth and death. It encompasses five generations of women and their relationships, both with each other and the myriad of other people that come and go in their lives.

There are certainly some difficult parts to watch and some parts were terribly sad, but then other parts were so beautiful, and other parts were so funny - Just like life. The film ends with Antonia's death (don't worry, I didn't give away a surprise ending - you know it's coming because it starts at the same moment), with her lover and her daugher and her granddaughter and her great-granddaughter and her friends at her side. And I cried right along with them.

I don't blog often about movies I've seen, but I had never heard of this film before (Netflix recommended it to me because of my recent run of foreign movies) and I wanted to pass the recommendation on!!

Body Issues

2007-07-30T19:41:00.000-04:00

Many of my readers know me only through the internet. So let me give you a little bit of background about me and my body.

I am 5'9". I have been this tall since I was about 14. This made me hugely taller than pretty much every boy in middle school. I felt like an Amazon for most of my teenage years.

I was also born with a congential heart defect that went untreated for all of my teen years. A side effect of this was that I was very thin. I think I was referred to guidance at least once a year because everyone was positive I had an eating disorder. The year I got my driver's license I weighed about 125 lbs.

Because of the same heart problem, I was also never really able to exercise. I had no endurance. When we would do the mile run in school, I think my fastest time ever was about 13 minutes. I could not even run 1/4 mile without being totally out of breath. Of course, my gym teachers always just assumed I was lazy. Quite honestly, I assumed the same thing about myself.

So, once I had my heart surgery, I gained weight. Really, I was probably at a healthy weight for the first time in my life. I even started going to the gym. I was in pretty good shape for about a year.

Then I started law school, and adopted the bad habits of a law student and drank like a law student and gained a lot of weight. I think I gained about 25 lbs. Then I lost it when I finally re-joined the gym and was too poor to ever go out. Then I got a job working nights, and eating out pretty much every night with no time to exercise. So I gained it back plus ten.

Then I got pregnant and gained another 50 lbs. I lost some of that post-partum but not all of it. Then I got pregnant again and this time only gained about 35 lbs, but it still put me far far over the 200 lb mark.

After I had my daughter I was absolutely determined to lose the weight. I really started dieting. Breastfeeding helped - I burned like 500 calories a day sitting on my ass watching e/r. When she was about 8 months old, a new gym opened close to our house and we joined that - they offered free daycare as part of the family membership so it was perfect for me.

I made it back below 200, down to 180, then hit a plateau. Frustrated, I enrolled in a special weight loss program through the gym where I met with a nutrionist once a week and a personal trainer twice a week. The other ladies in my group were so jealous because I was a nursing mom and got 300 extra calories a day. Bwwaaaa haaaaa haaaaaaa!!!!

My trainer was so mean (in a good personal trainer should be mean sort of way) and during the course of the 12 weeks I lost another 20 lbs. Not only that, but I was in the best shape of my life. I didn't have the money to continue with the personal trainer, though, so when the program ended I didn't keep that momentum. We continued to go to the gym but only sporadically and slowly the fast food started creeping back in to my diet.

So over the past two years, I've pretty much held steady between 155-160 lbs. I've been able to hold that weight because I got rid of an entire closet full of plus sized clothes - when my pants start getting a little tight, I know I need to be better because there is nothing else to wear.

Most people who know me tell me how I great I look, but I secretly think this is because they knew me when I weighed 50 lbs more. I see myself naked and I know that I have a roll here and there that I did not use to have. I know that I used to have muscle definition here and there that I do not have any longer.

Lately I have been pretty uncommitted to eating any sort of healthy food and unwilling to go exercise. The scale has been slowly drifting upward again. I pretend not to notice this, but apparently my children don't believe in pretending not to notice things...

This week as I was making my son dinner he proclaimed that I was getting fat. I told him it wasn't a nice thing to say and it wasn't funny. He told me he wasn't being funny, he was just noticing my pants didn't fit so good like they used to. After a long talk about things that may be true but just not polite to say anyhow, I went into my bedroom and looked at myself in the mirror and had to admit he was right.

The truth is, it isn't even about how much I actually weigh. It's about knowing I can do better. It's about knowing I'm not taking care of myself. It's about knowing that it is a miracle of modern medicine that I can even do a brisk walk on the treadmill. If I'd been born even 50 years earlier, I'd have been dead by age 25. My health is something very precious to me because I lived the first 20 years of my life without it.

This is what's been on my mind this week. I talked with Erik about it and he's been feeling the need to work on the extra padding he's acquired on his tummy over the course of our marriage. So... here's the deal. 15 pounds by October 31st. If I can do it, I get to go to New York City with my sister in December for a weekend. If he can do it, he gets a weekend in Atlantic City. We can both win. We're holding each other to it.

I'll post updates on our progress.

Vacation - Day 15 - Home again

2007-07-29T12:04:00.000-04:00

After a whirlwind morning cleaning and packing up, it was time to leave. We always have a moment of silence as we pull away, sad to be going home but knowing it's time to get back to life.

Our drive home was actually not that bad. Instead of coming all the way up I-95, we decided to cut over to 301 and take that home. We made pretty great time and we were home before dinnertime, even with three stops for food, and gas, and coffee.

We had enough time to unpack, shower, and start laundry when Erik & I were back out the door. We had skybox tickets for the Ironbirds that night (our local minor league baseball team) and I wasn't going to miss it!!

It is also nice to return on a Friday. I had the whole rest of the weekend to unpack and do laundry and replenish the fridge and even go to the office to open mail and go through the phone messages before having to return on Monday.

I have to admit, as fun as vacation was, it was also nice to see my kitties again and sleep in my own comfy bed. There's just something about being in your own home, where you can walk around in your underwear and take as long as you want in the bathroom and your kids can be bratty with no judgement from anyone else.

Vacation - Day 14 - Carova Beach

2007-07-29T11:54:00.000-04:00

As I ended my last post, I didn't get much sleep on Wednesday night and my stomach was not in a good state. So of course, Thursday is the day we decided to drive to Carova Beach.

When the paved road ends just past the Currituck lighthouse, you can actually keep driving on the beach. The beach is the road, and there is a whole community further up. It's a great place to spend the day - the beach isn't very crowded and you can find just amazing whole beautiful shells.

I normally love going up there, but my stomach was awful and I was SO tired. But I didn't want to be the only person left at home, so I decided to go anyway.

It ended up being pretty fun. My tummy calmed down enough that (thank goodness) I was never sick on the beach. After lunch, though, I was just so tired that I actually fell asleep sitting up in the beach chair while Marc was talking to me. I was asleep for about an hour (I think) and when I woke up I felt SO much better.

After my power nap, I played with Marc & Lisey in the waves while Erik and his family played ultimate frisbee. Soon Marc & Lisey started getting tired and hot, so I had them bury each other in the sand for the last little while. I was glad to get back to the house and shower and lay down though. It was a fun day but it was a long day too.

That night everyone went back out to Jockey's Ridge to jump off the giant sand dune. I decided to stay behind (tummy still not feeling great) and start cleaning up and packing. I was a bit horrified to start gathering things up and realize how much shit my kids had managed to collect over the course of the two weeks. It was an entire box full of toys and gadgets and papers and animals and bouncy balls and pirate treasure and t-shirts.

I had been a little bit better. I tried to limit my shopping and not go totally crazy. I had bought a bunch of stuff at Try My Nuts - because they really do have the world's best nuts!! And great coffee too - it's called Wake The Fuck Up coffee. I love it.

I also had way too much fun at the Christmas Mouse but it's really the only place I ever buy new ornaments for our tree. I try to buy each member of the family a few things that really represent the year for us. The kids loved what I picked out for each of them, and even Erik had to admit that the poker-themed Christmas ornaments for him were pretty cool.

Vacation - Day 13 - Harry Potter and Karaoke

2007-07-29T11:46:00.000-04:00

Wednesday the Harry Potter movie was released. That was the one day of vacation that was just beastly hot, so it made sense to spend the afternoon in a nice air conditioned theatre with the Hogwarts gang.

Even my two kids made it through the movie, though Lisey was a little antsy towards the end. Marc was enthralled though. I was worried because the movie had some pretty scary parts, but apparently scary movies just don't bother my kids. They loved it.

That evening was our night out. Erik's dad watched the kiddos while Erik & I plus his two brothers and the wives all went out. We went to Mama Kwan's first, and amassed a huge collection of tiki mugs and shot glasses. Cool-Jen SIL was our designated driver for the evening, as she is pregnant and we're taking advantage of that until October.

We then went to Kelly's for awhile but other than the pool table there just wasn't a lot to do there and soon we decided to head out to karaoke. Karaoke at the Jolly Roger has become a beach tradition. We actually got there right at the beginning this year, so we had plenty of rounds to horrify the audience with our singing.

I am really not sure how much I had to drink, but it was a lot. To do karaoke, I have to have a pretty decent buzz to overcome my stage fright. The last round, I ended up singing It's Raining Men all by myself. It was great.

What wasn't so great was waking up at 5:00 in the morning with the worst case of heartburn which quickly turned into the worst case of the post-drinking fireshits I think I've ever had. Since I'd only gone to bed at 2:30, I was tired and sick and miserable most of the next morning.

Vacation - Day 12 - Pirate Treasure

2007-07-28T16:41:00.001-04:00

Tuesday was my favorite day of the whole vacation. The kids really wanted to take a day to drive to Ocracoke and dig for Blackbeard's treasure. We wanted to make this day really fun for them, so Erik and I worked on a pretty elaborate plan to pull it off.

We stopped at Dirty Dick's on the drive down for lunch. They have GREAT seafood and the hush puppies are soooooo good. Our next stop was Cape Hatteras, where Lisey & Marc finished their junior ranger activitie and were sworn in by the NPS rangers. We continued from there to the end of the island, where we caught the ferry to Ocracoke.

When we got to Ocracoke Island, we drove until we found a good potential buried treasure place. I distracted the kids by looking at the wild ponies while Erik quickly finished drawing the treasure map we had started working on before we left.

We then stopped at the Blackbeard Museum. While I took the kids to look for toy swords and pirate bandanas, Erik gave the map the clerk. Earlier when the kids had said we should try to find a map, I had suggested to Marc that maybe they'd have one at the Blackbeard Museum. So, of course, he asked the clerk.

The clerk was a great sport and whispered to him that she DID have one, but she'd been told to ONLY give it to a child who loved pirates. Since Marc was wearing a pirate shirt, she decided he was the one. She gave him the map, and the kids looked it over for awhile. Marc recognized the ponies on the map and knew exactly where we needed to go.

We drove back to the spot and while I distracted the kids again looking for more ponies, Erik buried our treasure. (Before we left on vacation, I'd taken an old looking basket and filled it with jewelry, coins, stones, and anything else that looked treasure-esque.) When Erik came back to tell us the coast was clear, the kids followed the map until they found the 'X' - two crossed sticks on the beach.

Marc and I dug until we hit the basket. The kids were SO excited. They didn't want to open it on the beach because somebody might see the treasure and try to steal it. So we took it back to the van and opened it there. They were amazed at all the stuff inside.

It was getting to be dinnertime, so we stopped for food at Howard's Pub (again, wonderful seafood and great hush puppies!) then caught the ferry back to Hatteras. When we got home, the kids opened the basket and spent hours going through the treasure, oooohing and aaaaahing.

Vacation - Day 11 - Shark Week

2007-07-28T16:35:00.001-04:00

On Monday, Erik and his dad took Marc for a plane ride. They flew out of Manteo and headed north to the lighthouse in Currituck. Erik flew the plane most the way, with the pilot doing the take off and landings. After the plane ride, the whole family met up for lunch at our favorite restaurant, the Weeping Radish.

After lunch I left Erik there with his brothers and dad to continue enjoying the beer. I took the kids to the aquarium and we were delighted to find out it was Shark Week!! Usually my kids go running through the aquarium to get to the gift shop, but this time was different.

Because Marc learned how to read this year, he wanted to read all the signs. It was so cute - he would read the little posters to Lisey then they'd go try to find all the different types of fish. They also stopped to do all the Shark Week activities, making little shark fin hats, coloring shark pictures, feeling a real piece of sharkskin, each getting a real shark tooth.

Lisey was too scared to do the touch tank, but Marc finally worked up the courage to put his hand in and feel a stingray. Each of the kids bought a stuffed octopus an a t-shirt at the gift shop, and then we stopped at Sonic on the way back the house, of course!!

Vacation - Day 9 and 10

2007-07-23T19:15:00.000-04:00

For the next two days, we decided trying to travel anywhere was crazy, since the traffic on Saturday and Sunday is horrific. We were happy to spend the morning on the beach, eat lunch, afternoon on the beach, eat dinner, after dinner playing beer pong or poker or any other drinking game we could think of.

By this time, my children had turned a beautiful golden brown color. We were very vigilant about making sure they were sunscreened at all times and I'm very happy to say that nobody got a sunburn doing the vacation!!

Vacation - Day 8 - Next family!!

2007-07-23T19:07:00.000-04:00

On Friday, we switched families. My family headed home and Erik's family arrived. Of course, the first order of business was taking the fridge previously occupied by my brother and his family's food and switching it to the fridge of beer and Mike's.

In North Carolina, the ABC stores open at 10:00... I was there at 9:58. I then immediately went to the grocery store for Magic Hat, and Red Stripe, and the Mike's variety pack. I was home by 11:00 a.m. and ready for the fun to begin!!

Erik's family wasted no time in unpacking and heading straight for the beach. For dinner that night, Erik took the fish they'd caught earlier in the week and cooked in an amazing beer batter. It was SO GOOD - even his brother who hates fish had two helpings.

It was interesting having the two families back to back. My kids, who had cousins galore to occupy them the whole previous week, immediately returned to their favorite past-time of arguing with each other. Luckily, Erik's step-brothers and their friends has brought the xbox, and Marc quickly learned to play Halo and stop bothering his sister.

And I think Erik was so glad to have beer-drinking, poker-playing folks around I thought he might die from the joy of it all.

Vacation - Day 7 - Water Country USA

2007-07-23T19:00:00.000-04:00

The last full day with my family, we decided to drive up to Williamsburg to go to Water Country, USA. We did this last year and it was one of the best days of vacation. The weather was great - Sunny, in the high 80's but with a nice breeze. My mom and my brother came with us, as did the younger cousins. It ended up working out very well. We had four adults and 7 kids total. Plenty of hands to divide and conquer various rides.

This year Marc was feeling much braver, so he was able to ride some of the larger water slides with Erik. Lisey was happy to ride the smaller slides over and over or even just splash around and play in the kiddie areas. I had a blast just spending some one on one time with Lisey sitting and playing in the shallow pool. We stayed longer than we originally planned because we were all just having too much fun to leave.

And, of course, on the way home we had to stop at Sonic for dinner... Again...

Vacation - Day 6 - Fireworks!!

2007-07-22T15:10:00.000-04:00

Wednesday was the 4th of July. We spent most of the day at the beach, then ventured up to the Whalehead Club in Corolla for the fireworks. I'd had the foresight to order a huge box of red white & blue glow in the dark necklaces which I handed out to everyone. Each of the kids had several.

My husband thought I was being cheesy until it got dark and he realized how amazingly easy this made it to identify every person in our group. The fireworks were fabulous, as they always are. Lisey panicked when the first one went off, covering her ears and crying to go to the car. After a few minutes, she calmed down enough to enjoy the show, but kept her hands over her ears the entire time anyhow.

Traffic was a bitch, as it always is. We planned on sitting in the parking lot for an hour and that was pretty much what we did. We had a DVD for the kids to watch and by the time we actually started moving along towards the beach house, the kids were asleep.

Vacation - Day 5 - We get rid of the men-folk

2007-07-22T11:55:00.001-04:00

My father took all of the boys in the house fishing on Tuesday, so we had a girl's day. We spent some time at the beach, and I was glad that my younger sister got to spend some quality bonding time with my daughter Lisey. They played together in the waves on the beach for hours.

That afternoon we watched Chick Flicks. Even Lisey sat with us while we all watched Pride & Prejudice, mindlessly noshing on M&M's on raisins and appropriately sighing when Mr. Darcy professes his love.

After the guys got back from fishing, the adults all went out for a nice dinner. We decided to go to Owen's, one of my favorite restaurants in Nags Head. So far the vacation had been completely dry, so hubby and I, along with my younger sis, volunteered to drive to the restaurant early to put our names on the list. We then had a nice half hour to sit in the bar and enjoy a drink. Sis & I both got mojitos and they were SO GOOD.

It really was nice to have a night to just sit and talk with my brother and sisters and spouses and my parents. Having us all at one table, we start to talk about growing up and funny memories and the things that make us a family. Despite the things that separate us all now (distance, religion, politics) I was glad to have that chance to sit and have fun and remember that we really do still have a lot in common.

Vacation - Day 4 - Elizabethan Gardens

2007-07-22T11:46:00.000-04:00

My youngest sister flew in late Sunday night from NYC. It was wonderful to have all of my siblings together. It's been a long time since we've had a vacation together. Monday afternoon my mother, my two sisters, my oldest niece and myself had a girl's day out. We stuffed ourselves senseless at the Weeping Radish on Sauerbraten and potato pancakes and spaetzle. Then we decided to tour the Elizabethan Gardens.

My husband mocks me because I love going to the gardens. There is an episode of Futurama where they go the park and there's a sign out front that says, "Yes!! We have tree viewing here!!" Anyway, I find it to be very peaceful and meditative. But that's because I usually go by myself. This year I went with my sisters...

I laughed so hard that my sides were hurting. First of all my older sister made the mistake of allowing me to push her 6 month old son's stroller. Gabriel and I were doing mad extreme stroller tricks and my sister was having a heart attack. I had to stop when the baby fell asleep though - apparently my off-road stroller adventure lulled him to an early nap.

Then the hydrangea - my mother loved the hydrangea and kept touching the blossoms. So my younger sister says, "Mom, don't re-arrange-a the hyndrangea." And my other sisters says, "Unless you are the range-a." And then I say, "Yes there might be dange-a." And my younger sister then says, "And you are only a strange-a." And then all three of us dissolved into the giggles and it was downhill from there.

Vacation - Day 3 - Finally, the beach!!

2007-07-22T11:34:00.000-04:00

Sunday morning while the rest of the family dressed in their best and headed off to church, my apostate children and husband put on sunscreen and headed to the beach. I had totally forgotten it was fast sunday, so I did feel a little bit bad for fixing breakfast for both my kids while their cousins sat there starving.

That morning, I took my laptop to a local internet cafe and checked my email for work. I also went to the grocery store and got a load of laundry done. I had my kids fed lunch and re-lotioned for a 2nd round at the beach before their cousins returned from church. Sometimes I forget what a completel time-sucker church can be!!

It was pretty amazing to see all the cousins play together. We had 10 kids total and for the whole week, I never saw one big fight. Even my kids were just too busy having fun with their cousins to fight with each other.

Sunday afternoon we got a visit from the a/c repairmam - one of the units had broken and needed to be replaced. At one point, my family was saying the prayer before dinner when the guy came bursting into the house making a huge amount of noise and yelling something to a co-worker outside. He saw my family was praying and immediately stopped and bowed his head. When the prayer was over he apologized for interrupting and a thick southern drawl said, "It's alright. I love Jesus too!!"

For the rest of the week, anytime anyone did something embarassing we'd just repeat that - It's alright. I love Jesus too!!

Vacation - Day 2 - To the Baptism we go

2007-07-20T20:21:00.001-04:00

We left fairly early to head back to Va Beach for my niece's baptism. The baptism was very nice and both hubby & I got to take a turn holding my sister's 6 month old baby.

We realized as we started driving back to the Outer Banks that this was the worst idea... ever... The traffic going into the Outer Banks on a Saturday afternoon is truly horrendous. And on top of it, I had an evil migraine but no medication - I'd left it all at the beachhouse. Mix that with the four children in the minivan (we were transporting an extra niece and nephew) and I was pretty much in tears for the three hour traffic jam.

I did figure out that once we got on to the island, there was a back road that led to the beach house. We ended up getting back to the house at the same time as my parents, who had left almost 45 minutes ahead of us. Yay, me - Master of the Alternate Route!!

I took a Frova, put in my earplugs, placed a cool washcloth over my eyes and drifted off into the nicest sensory-deprivation sleep I might have ever had. I woke up to the smell of my brother's chili (most excellent). I made myself a chili cheesy frito laced bowl of heaven and felt about 500% better.

I had to answer a few questions about the baptism for my kids. Marc seemed to think it was pretty cool and wanted to know if he could be baptized too. I told him if he got baptized into his cousin's church then he had to go to church every Sunday for three hours. He decided that wasn't so cool.

He was also very concerned because they said at the baptism that everyone had to be baptized. I told him that his cousins go to a church that believes that is necessary, but that we don't believe that is. He seemed fine with that explanation and just mostly seemed relieved that during the nightly scripture/hymn/prayertime he got the PlayStation to himself while his cousins had to sit and read a "really boring book".

We also had a bit of a controversy when we realized that Lisey didn't have any swimsuits packed. Erik took her to buy some new ones and, of course, they were two piece suits. Lisey refuses to wear a one piece suit because what if she has to poop?? Anyway, the female cousins were most upset and felt like this was NOT fair and begged Uncle Erik to PLEASE talk to their mother because they thought it was a dumb rule to begin with.

Vacation - Day 1 - Great Dismal Swamp

2007-07-16T21:38:00.000-04:00

It was a wonderful long needed two weeks of vacation.

We left Thursday afternoon and stayed the night in a lovely motel in Suffolk Virginia. I say lovely, as it was one of those motels that you have to slip the clerk cash under the teeny slot in the bullet proof glass. And the train that ran every ten minutes RIGHT BEHIND the motel was also a nice touch.

Anyway, we couldn't get into the house until Friday afternoon, so I decided to be adventurous and visit the Great Dismal Swamp. Folks, there's a reason this is the called the Great Dismal Swamp. George Washington named it that in the 1700's for a pretty goddamn good reason. And the only reason I think the NPS owns it today is because nobody ever wanted to buy it from the government over the past 300 years.

Our trip to the Great Dismal Swamp involved us getting out of the car, immediately being swarmed by the biggest fucking biting flies I'd ever seen and running back towards the car screaming. The flies then swarmed the van. I was screaming to Erik, "Drive! Drive! Before they pull out the rocket launchers!!"

One thing I do love about going to the Outer Banks is that there are like, 3 Sonics on the way. So of course, we had to stop at the Sonic for lunch. Over the course of the next two weeks, I think I went to Sonic at least 6 times and no, I am not exaggerating. Because I love the Slush. LOVE IT.

After lunch we drove to Bodie Island and the kids worked on their Junior Ranger activities with the help of the friendly NPS folks. I love those park rangers. Seriously, I've never met a park ranger that wasn't nice. We were going to finish their Junior Ranger up that day but a huge nasty thunderstorm blew in and so we just ran to the van and headed for the house.

We love this house. We stay there every year. My kids even know the address of the beach house. Driving up is like seeing an old friend again.

Making my peace

2007-06-24T18:26:00.000-04:00

We are preparing for our annual trip to the Outer Banks. This year I am lucky enough to get two weeks. The first week will be with my family, the second week will be with Erik's family. My sister's daughter will be having her baptism during our trip. This works out well, since my sister only lives about 90 minutes away from where we are staying (it is normally a 7 hour drive for us).

As I was starting to pack for the trip, and reminding myself to bring church clothes for myself and the kids, I suddenly thought about this post from last summer. And I realized that the vast majority of that angst is gone. I can't think of anything magic that has happened. No big event. Just time passing, I guess. There have been more family gatherings, a visit to church for my nephew's blessing, encounters with former ward members.

The other day I was having a conversation with Marc's teacher who mentioned (as part of a story he was telling) that another student in his class was Mormon. He started to explain something about Mormonism (again, relevant to the story he was telling) and I just laughed. I told him I knew all about it - I was raised Mormon and my whole family still attended that church.

He was very surprised - he had absolutely no idea. He said that seemed like that type of religion that you just don't leave. I told him it isn't and that it was very difficult. He said I didn't seem "Mormon" to him at all. I told him thank you. And I realized that now I've been out of the church for so long (it's been almost two years) that I have a whole new group of friends who never knew me as a Mormon.

Anyway, I've just been reflecting on this all. And I do feel like I've made my peace. I just don't have the anger any more. I don't have the awkwardness with my family. I don't have the feeling of being lost. I've finally reached that magic place that From the Ashes wonderfully identified as the goal so many of us have - that now I can just say, "Oh yeah, I was a Mormon once."

Having a Cornershop moment...

2007-06-23T01:40:00.001-04:00

Many years ago Erik and I went to see Kula Shaker at the 930 club in DC. It was right after the 930 club had moved, and since we weren't really sure where it was, we got there REALLY early just in case we got lost. So we're just sitting in the car and this guy walks buy in the ugliest shirt I'd ever seen and a skirt.

We both look at each other and just start laughing. For the next two hours, we are pretty much mocking this poor guy we saw earlier walking down the street in the ugliest shirt ever made and a skirt. Until the opening act took the stage... and the lead singer was... THAT GUY...

Yes, we had been mocking the singer of Cornershop (anyone else remember Brimful of Asha??) for pretty much the whole night. And yes, he was on stage wearing that ugly shirt and apparently NOT a skirt, but in fact, a sari of some sort. We still laugh about that night.

So tonight we went to see Shiny Toy Guns at Sonar in Baltimore (thanks again to Jeremy for turning me onto them!!) I'd had several Irish Coffees prior to arriving at the club, so had a nice buzz going. The opening band (Hourly Radio) was excellent, and as I was grooving to the music, I noticed a very tall guy dressed all in black with a horrid burgundy scarf standing behind me.

Of course, how could I not mock this horrid scarf?? From that moment on, he was ASCOT MAAAAAN. We made so many Scooby Doo/Fred jokes, I almost peed myself laughing. There were just so many emo jokes to make, how could we stop??

Okay, so you know how this is going to end, right? Because karma is a total bitch...

So the next band starts to play...

Here is a picture... This would be Stars of Track and Field...

Although it is difficult to see in these camera phone pictures, I will direct your attention to the neck of the lead singer...

Yes, please take notice of the horrid burgundy ascot...

Oh, and Shiny Toy Guns ROCKED!!!

Tagged again...

2007-06-05T19:29:00.000-04:00

This time by Sara Sue and I couldn't feel more specialer.

Here it is - "I quickly write 8 random facts/habits about myself, and then tag 8 people. If I tag you, you had better play".

1. Some of you already know this, some don't... But my breastbone is wired together in three places as a result of past heart surgery. You can actually feel the wires in some places. I have a spectacular scar running from my just below my throat to just above my stomach - and I honestly forget I have it until someone asks me about it.

2. I cannot walk out of the house in the morning without cleaning my ears. Even if I don't have time to take a shower, I will still take 30 seconds and take a wash cloth to my ears to get all the gook out.

3. My daughter Elise is named after a song by the Cure, not a song by Beethoven.

4. When I went to Spain, my favorite part of the whole trip was playing with the stray cats that run free all over Alhambra in Granada. I think that confirms I am indeed a crazy cat person.

5. I can't drink gin because everytime I do, I end up taking off my clothes. EVERY TIME. I just can't handle that stuff.

6. Sometimes, I just really really really really must have a chicken tamale from Don Pablo's.

7. When I have a really important conference at work and I know there is a jackass man on the other side, I purposefully will dress in something pink and something above the knee because then I am automatically assumed to be vapid - I like my opponent to underestimate me because then when I open my mouth and am actually very smart they are surprised. You would be shocked at how often this strategy works, but it still makes me sad that it does.

8. I had a terrible day today and stole a Valium from my husband (he has an Rx to take before dental procedures because he's needle-phobic and they don't want him to pass out) and now I feel much better.

So now I am tagging... Erik, Cool Jen SIL, Jer-my, Sister Mary Lisa, Janet from DC, Sacred Sister, Lemon Blossom, and Ros F. If you got tagged twice sorry 'bout that. I blame the Valium.

Spending the day with Vincent and Henri

2007-06-03T01:03:00.000-04:00

Today I got up at the ass-crack of dawn to catch a bus to NYC. At 11:00 I was at Rockefeller Center hugging my younger sister. We had lunch and coffee (her treat - a late birthday present) and then she had to go to work, so I had the afternoon to myself. I didn't have a chance to go to MOMA last time I was there, and it was #1 on my list.

I spent a little over three glorious hours meandering through the museum. I have to admit, as I actually stood in front of the Starry Night and saw it for the first time in person... I cried. So if you were in MOMA today around 1:00 and happened to see a mid-thirties chick weeping in gallery #1 - yeah, that was me.

At 3:30 I started to head back towards where the bus was supposed to pick us up, except now I was carrying a big bag of books I bought for the kids. I decided to stop at the Starbucks for a quick coffee before trekking towards Central Park. When I walked out the door, THERE WAS MY BUS. Seriously... randomly... it just happened to be sitting right outside the entrance. I walked over and asked the driver if I could just board the bus there and he said sure. He said he had just sort of been waiting in the bus lane there until it was time to get the rest of the people. So I got a free ride for the last several blocks.

I realized today that I am one of those people - I *heart* New York. Everytime I leave, I can't wait to go back and see more. It is only $30 for a round trip bus ticket!! I cannot even drive to Baltimore and park for the day for that amount of money. I may have to make this a regular event.

But liquor is quicker

2007-05-30T21:57:00.000-04:00

I love Keane. They are absolutely in my top 5 favorite bands of all time. Keane's first album is still one of the few I can listen to start to finish and love every song. I had the chance to see them two summers ago when they toured with the Killers as the opening act.

Sunday I got to see them again in Philadelphia. At the Tower Theater. Which is my new favorite concert venue because, dear blog readers... It has A BAR. Not cheap shit, either - Top Shelf, my friends. And you can take drinks to your seat. And a double SoCo and Lime is the same price as a beer, but you seriously get like 4x the alcohol.

So I got to sit with my hubby and one of our very best couple-friends with a very large SoCo and Lime and just get buzzed in my 7th row seats and watch an amazing show. Keane is a great live band. You can tell they love what they do. They love their fans. I love their music. It was heaven. Really, I can only describe the whole thing as a spiritual experience.

Middle Ages

2007-05-27T10:43:00.000-04:00

The fact that I didn't even really blog about my own birthday seems to illustrate how sort of pretty boring it was. I ended up sharing my birthday with Lisey's friend-party, which was fine with me. I couldn't think of any exciting plans, so it gave me an excuse to just eat the chocolate Volcano at Rainforest Cafe and be okay with that.

I have to admit this past week I am feeling really old. I am now solidly in my mid-thirties. My child-bearing days are behind me and am well into child-rearing now. The biggest excitement in my marriage is that we are getting ready to take out a home equity loan in order to re-do the bathrooms. Maybe even some landscaping. This has given us more to talk about than we have had in months.

I am not complaining. I love my life. I just can't help but feel that to an outside observer, it really must appear quite ordinary. But right now I am listening to Lisey in the bedroom doggy-piling Erik in order to wake him up, and it's making me smile.

Happy Birthday, Baby Girl!!

2007-05-16T22:09:00.000-04:00

I knew you were going to be something special even before you were born. I went into labor with you during a lunar eclipse, so I figured that was some sort of sign.

You were such an easy baby. My labor with you was only 3 hours long. I spent an hour of that in bed at home trying to decide if I was really in labor. I spent the next hour soaking in the bathtub trying to get comfortable waiting for PopPop to arrive and watch Marc. I spent the next thirty minutes driving to the hospital.

The final thirty minutes was spent mostly just checking in and trying to convince the triage nurse that I was actually in labor. By the time I got a room and the midwife arrived to check my progress, I was ready to push. Three pushes later you arrived. My water never even broke. You surfed into this world. I never even broke a sweat.

The first thing I noticed is that you had the longest fingernails I'd ever seen on a baby. I don't have any good newborn pictures of you because you'd scratched yourself up so much in the womb with your talons. You were a very serious baby. You actually managed to nurse with a scowl on your face. You were content just to be carried around in the sling, watching what was going on around you.

But as the above picture demonstrates, you quickly learned to love the good things in life. I am not exaggerating when I say that "coffee" was one of your first words. Despite my best efforts not to gender stereotype you, you've grown up to be the girliest girl in the universe. You wear make up more often than I do. I don't think you own a piece of clothing that is not pink, or sparkly, or decorated with a kitty cat. You are truly a princess.

Today you turned 4. I can hardly believe how the time has flown. You light up my world every day with your smile and your laughter. You are my joy and my treasure. I love you Lisey.

Interestingly enough, my husband was simultaneously posting on the same topic in this post.

Mommy Milk

2007-05-12T09:37:00.000-04:00

Sacred Sister has inspired me with this post which is joining with the many proud women posting their beautiful breastfeeding boobies across the blogging universe. I am still in search of a decent picture to post here of me and my milk guzzling beasties (as I called them during their nursing years).

During the early posts of this blog, I went by the name Jersey Cow because I was still nursing my daughter. I posted about weaning her. That was about two years ago now. My husband used to refer to me as a lactivist because I was always telling anyone who would listen about the joys and benefits of momma milk.

You name it, I probably breastfed there. I breastfed in restaurants, book stores, libraries, malls, coffee shops, national parks, civil war battlefields, rotary meetings, and even the courthouse (I was stuck in trial so my husband brought the baby to me during my breaks). I once breastfed my son while walking through Timpanogos Cave. By the time my daughter was born, I'd gotten pretty good at it, and I used to actually breastfeed her while I was making dinner for my son at the same time.

One of my proudest moments was when my daughter got her first baby doll. Instead of giving the baby a bottle, she would hand it to me for mommy milk. I thought that was wonderful. I hope that stays with her.

And so let me shout a hell yeah in support of proud nursing mommas everywhere. Don't be shy. Babies need to eat!! And I have to selfishly admit that when I started to lose my baby weight, I was most pleased to find out I got an extra 350 calories every day for doing nothing other than sitting on the couch, watching tv while holding my cutie pie baby and lactating.

I'm off in search of beautiful boobie pictures...

Feel the burn

2007-05-10T18:37:00.000-04:00

The pole burn, that is. Last night I went into a spin... well, it was just WRONG and I have a red mark starting at my wrist half way up to my elbow. It is quite painful, yet oh so awesome to be able to say... I have pole burn!!

Oh, and I definitely love my black shoes the best of all the shoes I've tried out in class so far:

Our lives are made in these small hours

2007-04-29T19:35:00.000-04:00

We spent another beautiful Sabbath day worshipping at the church of the great outdoors. You will have to forgive the poor photo quality here - all we had was Erik's camera phone. This time we hiked a trail in Susquehanna state park - I was worried the kids wouldn't be able to make it, but they did amazing. I was so proud of them!! Our first stop on the trail was an old barn and silo, where the kids actually swung on vines.

This picture is fuzzy, but that is the silo behind Erik and the kids, to give you an idea how tall it is. You can see all the vines hanging down too.

As we started back down the trail, we came across an entire hillside just exploding with wildflowers. It was absolutely beautiful. I'm not sure what flowers these are, but I believe it is periwinkle. It's hard in the picture to show how amazing it was - the flowers just went on and on. Marc said it was like a sky full of stars.

The path crosses several small streams. We are standing on a bridge while Erik is actually balanced on a rock in the water.

This is a huge-mongous beetle that the kids thought was cool and wanted a picture of, while I stood there going let'sgolet'sgolet'sgolet'sgo right nooooow.

After we finished the hike, we let the kids play at the playground near the picnic grounds. While we were there, Erik and I had the joy of watching a pair of bumblebees engaged in bumblebee lovin'. Even better, another boy bumblebee was trying to get in on the hot action, so we watched a bumblebee love triangle unfold right before us. For some reason, the sight of this bumblebee menage a trois had me laughing so hard, the other parents started to give us funny looks.

The kids were both so good on the trail, we stopped at a local ice cream shop for a treat. Right before this picture Erik told them to "pretend you love each other."

Morsel of Wisdom

2007-04-28T18:47:00.000-04:00

My husband shared this morsel with me last night. Normally I scoff at his life=poker parallels, but this one really struck me. I am making this my new mantra.

This is my religion

2007-04-23T21:25:00.000-04:00

On Sunday we decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather by taking a hike out to Turkey Point. We stopped at the Wawa and got subs and chips and juices and set out on our way.

Once we reached the lighthouse, we stopped to eat our lunch.

Then continued our walk until we reached the edge of the cliffs.

During our hike, we talked about the difference between evergreen and deciduous trees, listened for different kinds of birds, looked for four leaf clovers, learned how to read the trail markings, pointed out familiar spots all along the Susquehanna Flats, saw ladybugs and worms and spiders, climbed a few trees and gathered some new specimens for our rock collection. We also talked about what trash from our lunches could be recycled, or fed to the animals, or had to be put in the garbage can.

It struck me as we walked back to the van that a few years ago, my children would have spent this beautiful day stuck in a classroom learning to obey the words of old dead men. I prefer our Sunday School.

A Service to Google Searchers

2007-04-18T08:19:00.000-04:00

There is a woeful lack out there on the internet of lists of good songs for pole dancing. Trust me, I'm always looking and everytime I search I get shit like Kid Rock and Def Leppard. So here it is... My list of good songs to pole dance to:

1. Faster Pussycat Kill (Paul Oakenfold)
2. Headsprung (LL Cool J)
3. Smack That (Akon)
4. Shake That (Eninem)
5. Ooh La La (Goldfrapp)
6. Loose Fit (Happy Mondays)
7. Scandalous (Mis-teeq)
8. Buttons (Pussycat Dolls)
9. Le Disko (Shiny Toy Guns)
10. Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is (Jet)

As an added service, I will also share that Bedtime Stories by Madonna and Steppin' Out by Kaskade are excellents songs to warm up and cool down too. And though extremely obvious, SexyBack is really a great song for swinging on the pole.

You are welcome, google users.

Borrowed from Cool-Jen

2007-04-12T21:32:00.000-04:00

Sort by Song Title;
What are the first and last songs?

first: "Heroes", David Bowie
last: Zoot Suit Riot, Cherry Poppin Daddies

Sort by Artist; what are the first and last artists?

first: 10000 Maniacs
last: Yaz

Sort by Time; what are the first and last songs?

first: Horn Intro, Modest Mouse (:09)
last: Sleep, Don't Weep, Damien Rice (21:54)

Sort by Album; what are the first and last albums?

first: (What's the Story) Morning Glory?, Oasis
last: Zombies! Aliens! Vampires! Dinosaurs!, HelloGoodbye

Top 5 Played Songs:

Fix You - Coldplay
Somewhere Only We Know - Keane
Bedtime Story - Madonna
Mr. Brightside - The Killers
She Says - Howie Day

Most Recent 5 of your Recently Added:

That I Would Be Good - Alanis Morissette
This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race - Fall Out Boy
Rehab - Amy Winehouse
Rock 'n' Roll, Part II - Gary Glitter
Annie, Would I Lie To You - Iris

Find “sex” - how many songs show up? 18
Find “death” - how many songs show up? 4
Find “love” - how many songs show up? 246

Trust me, this will vastly improve gender relations

2007-04-12T21:26:00.000-04:00

I have a brilliant idea. As a woman, my biggest complaint is that my husband just can't possible understand how miserable I am at this moment, simply because he's never experienced a menstrual cramp. I think that really, the best idea would be for me to just kick him really hard in the nuts once a month. I'd feel better, and then he would be experiencing a pain that no woman could possible understand.

Also, during labor, a woman should be permitted to punch the father in the balls during each contraction. It's only fair.

But for some reason, my husband is not on board with my new plan and I think he's actually hiding from me right now...

Start spreading the news

2007-04-02T11:59:00.000-04:00

We are leaving tomorrow for NYC! I am ashamed to admit that I've lived most of my life a two hour train ride away, yet have never visited the Big Apple. I promise to take lots of pictures and will hopefully have an interesting tale or two to share upon our return!!

Hope

2007-03-24T18:11:00.000-04:00

One of the most difficult things about losing my faith was the loss of hope that came with it.

Today my husband discovered that a mother bird built her nest in the lavender wreath I hung on the front door last week to celebrate the arrival of Spring.

I can't tell you exactly why, but this gives me hope. Somehow, we really are all connected.

Inappropriate music for commercials

2007-03-21T19:55:00.000-04:00

I mean, really people. Who is the genius who paired Blister in the Sun with a commercial for Wendy's? Let's pair a song about male ejaculation with cheeseburgers! YUMMY!!!